Ellana's Cultural Studies on Humanity Chapter 13:- Who is OSCAR?

[Stormtrooper1990]

It had been twelve days since my recapture following my partial success at the United Nations, where I learned that it was nothing more than another layer of Earth's bureaucracy. The individual nations held more sway and in that hardly anything was achieved. Nevertheless, in between Kremm's lessons which were tough but rewarding all the same and finishing all the first drafts of my exploits, it was the MiB once again who would provide me with my next destination. I had overheard my foolish chatty guards talk about something called the OSCARS. I had asked them about it but they remained impassive. After a quick bit of research using the internet, I had found out that it was a human awards ceremony for its performing celebrities and ran by some human called OSCAR. And it was in the city of Los Angeles. Intrigued, I planned my next escape, although i hadn't planned on escaping until much later. My interest was piqued and as any member of the XS will tell you, one cannot ignore fresh leads. On Thursday 7th March, Kremm and I put our plan into action. An explosive distraction by Kremm drew my guards away, and as soon as they were clear he cut the power. Using my superior night vision, I had emerged out into an alley in Midtown. Hearing slight footsteps from my position behind the dumpster I readied myself to acquire my first form...



Dr Ellana Xenoanthropological Society



Thursday 7th March 2024 08:30am Midtown Manhattan



Ellana smiled as she cinched her tie standing over the unconscious naked body of a Becky Milhouse an 18 year old catholic school girl, with an attractive petite form and an equally comely rounded features, slender cheekbones and bright blue eyes. Her honey blonde hair once in pigtails lay draped around her bared slender shoulders. Becky lay on her side her pretty A-cup breasts with puffy light pink areolas, cute small clitoris topped with the barest strip of honey blonde pubic hair and firm pert buttocks on full display. She had grabbed the girl by her tie pulling her into her embrace, behind the dumpster. After a quick release of pheromones, young Becky hungrily returned Ellana's kiss only to slide unconscious down the side of the dumpster. Ellana had learned quite a bit about her as she relieved the girl of her uniform; a black blazer with the logo for St Mildred's School on her right breast, over a white blouse with a green pleated knee high skirt and matching tie. White knee high socks, sensible black flat shoes. Underwhich she was wearing a white lacy underwired bra with matching thong. Ellana had also helped herself to Becky's piercings, ear studs and belly button. According to her memories, Becky shared an intimate kiss with her best friend in the girl's toilets yesterday. She is now certain she is lesbian and her friend as reciprocated but she's afraid to come out to her conservative catholic parents. It bemuses me why humans should consider that a problem. It's perfectly natural. On Zenobia Prime, it's readily accepted but quite a complicated affair... shrugging Ellana tore up her prison undervest binding Becky's wrists and ankles gagging her, before picking her up under her shoulders from behind. Dragging her hands on the girl's small breasts, Ellana tipped the bound naked girl into the dumpster along with the remains of her prison uniform. Looping the schoolgirls satchel over her shoulder, Ellana walked out of the alley.



She quickly flagged down a passing yellow taxi, jumping into the back snapping the door behind her. "Where to- Hold on a second?" The cab driver turned to her. "Aren't you supposed to be going to school, kid?" Ellana flashed him a smile. "My class is going on a school trip aboard. I need to get to JFK, now. I woke up a little late and missed my bus. Silly me." She lied as the cabbie flashed her a sympathetic look. "Alright. JFK it is. You want me to step on it?" Ellana nodded as the man put the taxi into gear. Ellana checked the girls purse. Enough money for a cab ride but not enough for a plane ticket. Not to worry I will find a ticket and a quick change when I'am there. No shortage of human females there after all. Just need a flight to Los Angeles She leant back into her seat watching New York fly past her window.


JFK International Airport 09:30am


As soon as she entered the departure terminal, Ellana scanned the departure boards noticing a American Airlines flight to LAX leaving in just over half an hour. Perfect I just need a suitable form. Stewardess perhaps or... Nearby the sound of an attractive medium red headed human female talking on her phone, drew her attention. Getting closer Ellana eavesdropped on her conversation. " Yes boss, thanks for this second chance. I'am so looking forward to going to LA to cover the OSCARS." Ellana smiled as she appraised the woman. She was beautiful with heart shaped features, high cheekbones and big green eyes. She wore a fetching black leather jacket, over a white halter top, belted tight blue jeans with knee high black leather riding boots. Adorning her neck was a silver love heart pendant with matching ear studs. "Yeah, don't worry boss. I'am not going to screw this up. I will get some smashing pictures of J-Law looking fabulous. Okay, talk to you later." The woman hung her phone up, replacing it into her black leather handbag before walking towards the women's bathroom. Ellana followed discreetly behind. Time for a quick change She smiled.



Meredith Connor let out a long sigh of relief as she emptied her bladder, her black lace bikini hipsters down around her ankles with her blue jeans. She was relieved for a other reason. After the whole debacle during her stint at the current affairs desk, Meredith wasn't sure whether her editor Seeley would fire her or not. But instead he put her on the Showbiz track, a position more suited to her talents anyway. Besides she would be rubbing her shoulders with the elite. She would have plenty to tell her girlfriend Rose when she got back. The sound of the bathroom door opening drew her attention. "Hey, hello? Is someone there? Just give me a minute." As she wiped herself pulling up her panties and jeans, the woman on the other side knocked. "Just a minute. I'am coming out, jesus." She opened the door to reveal a young blonde schoolgirl with pigtails smiling at her. "Can you get out of my way sweetie. I have a plane to catch...oh?" Her voice trailed off as the girl caressed her cheek "No, I have a plane to catch." She grinned pinning her to the toilet bowl with a full kiss on her lips, straddling her. Meredith returned her kiss, despite thinking of her beloved Rose as she felt her jeans being unbelted. I'am so sorry, Rose. I'am snogging an 18 year old, I feel so ashamed... Her eyes rolled back into her head, as she slumped unconscious onto the toilet bowl the schoolgirl still straddling her. Ellana wiped her mouth with her cuff "Meredith Connor, 25, showbiz reporter. She was transferred from Current Affairs after she was implicated in a phone hacking scandal against a US senator but the case was settled out of court. Interesting, she as a rose tattoo on her right ankle. It's a reference to her girlfriend, Rose." Ellana spoke with Meredith's New York accent, grinning as she stripped off Becky's school uniform.


Ellana removed Meredith's jewellery putting them on herself before unzipping her leather boots pulling them off her feet, exposing the small rose tattoo on her ankle. After slipping off the woman's leather jacket from her shoulders an arm at a time, Ellana looped the halter top over Meredith's head sliding the garment over her head revealing her c-cup breasts covered by a black lace bra. As she unclasped the reporters bra, Ellana admired her well formed C-cup breasts with perky dark red circular areolas. Clipping on Meredith's bra she then unfastened the already unbelted jeans working them off her shapely hips peeling them down her long slender legs along with the matching lace hipster shorts, getting a good glimpse of the woman's full womanhood decorated with a thin trimmed strip of auburn hair. Pulling up the stolen shorts between her thighs, Ellana got dressed in the rest of Meredith's clothes. Once she had zipped up the boots slipping on the leather jacket, Ellana bound the slim naked Meredith with Becky's socks before gagging her with the tie. Picking the naked woman under her shoulders, Ellana dragged her into the attendants cupboard propping her up against the wall behind a mop and bucket. Tossing Beckys uniform on top of her body, Ellana closed the door on the reporter leaving her in darkness. Picking up her handbag, Ellana found a plane ticket, a hotel reservation, phone and make up bag. Using Meredith's make top touch herself up, Ellana looped the handbag over her shoulder sweeping from the bathroom. Using the woman's memories, Ellana made her way through the terminal boarding the flight at Gate 3


LA Hilton Room 148 18:00pm


After two months on Earth, Ellana had become accustomed to air travel. Whether it was impersonating a passenger or assuming the duties of a stewardess she was comfortable. I much prefer being a passenger, less work and I get to avoid the lustful glances of male and even some female passengers. Although one of these days, I would like to get into the cockpit and try my hand at piloting. It can't be any different to a shuttle. During the six hour flight, Ellana had enjoyed researching earth movies in preparation for her OSCARs investigation. The in flight entertainment was a period film from early earth history called The Colour of Moonlight , a curiously bland title about settlers in 19th century America. It featured a very talented actress called Jennifer Lawrence, who was also very pretty. She had asked a passing stewardess about the woman. " She's up for the Best Actress award for this movie. Although she faces stiff competition from Kim Kardashian." Memorising these name's for later Ellana ordered another bowl of Vanilla Ice-cream.


By 18:00pm, Ellana had checked into the LA Hilton hotel using Meredith's room reservation and had paid the security deposit. As she was about to reach for Meredith's hand luggage, an helpful young human male dressed in a curious double breasted uniform took it for her as he lead her to room 148. Fascinating, such excellent service, I haven't investigated temporary residences on earth yet. I must make this an avenue of inquiry for later . After giving the man an appropriate tip, Ellana was left alone in her room. Switching on the TV, she listened to a news report about the OSCARs as she stocked the wardrobe with Meredith's clothes. "Preparations are underway for the 96th Academy Awards here at the Dolby Theatre in LA, on Sunday evening. Staff are rolling out the red carpet for what's lining up to be a memorable night." The pretty blonde beamed as she continued. "The talk on everyone's lips is; Will Jennifer Lawrence secure her second OSCAR? Or will Kim Kardashian steal it out from under her? What's your take Bob?" Ellana pondered for a moment. I have three days until the ceremony. That should give me plenty of time to explore a little of Los Angeles. Perhaps scope out some places for future investigations. Right now though, I could with a snack Walking up to the phone on the bedside table, Ellana pressed the button putting the receiver to her ear. "Hi this is room 148. Yes the accommodations are to my liking. I would like to order room service please..."



The night of the OSCARs Sunday 10th March 2024 19:35pm



Over the course of the next three days, Ellana had explored the surrounding area noting areas that had a lot of potential for future visits the movie studios in particular appeared the most promising as did the local beaches and Beverley Hills. I'am still amazed that Earth doesn't have simulations like our film industry. They still view movies on giant screens, how quaint and old fashioned. They are missing out on so much. Ellana had also found the most curious features, a street lined with stars with names of various people. When she asked a local what the significance of these where, she had said "This whole city is one monument to movies. These paving slabs are how we honour them." She found the idea intriguing. So if Las Vegas is the city of Sin? Los Angeles is the city of movies? But why call it that. I mean what's the giant "Hollywood" on the hill about? That what was confused her the most. "Shouldn't that be 'Los Angeles'? Why call it Hollywood?" She had asked the woman. The girl simply laughed shaking her head. "You haven't been in LA long, huh? Hollywood is part of LA. It's the name of the movie industry. Not much of a showbiz reporter are you?" Now even more confused, Ellana had retreated to her hotel to get ready for the OSCARs. After a quick shower, Ellana had picked out one of Meredith's dresses a strapless Little Black Dress with black lace strapless bra and matching G-string thong. Adorning herself with the reporters jewellery along with her make up, Ellana looped her handbag, camera and press pass over her head. Leaving the hotel, she hailed a taxi and headed straight for the Dolby Theatre.


The Dolby Theatre 20:00pm


Using her cover, Ellana took pictures of the stars that walked down the red carpet. Wondering what the red carpet actually signified. Is this an awards ceremony or a religious service? They are revered like gods, just like the Mickey Mouse Theocracy in France. I'am reminded of a Royal Gala back home. They were all dressed in their expensive finery, men in expensive suits, women in glittering dresses. Ellana had noticed Jennifer Lawrence walking down the carpet wearing a beautiful strapless red dress with red heels, silver diamond jewellery with matching heels. Her dark brown hair tied into a knot, with blonde highlights. Taking her picture, Ellana weighed up her options. There is no way I'm getting into the ceremony as Meredith. I need a new form. I cannot take out one of these actresses, not yet. Too public. Hmm? She scanned a nearby waitress, a pretty brunette with diamond shaped features, high cheekbones and slanted brown eyes. Her short light brown cut short into a boyish pixie cut. She was standing offering glasses of champagne. What about the help? A uniform like hers should get me into the venue, until I can acquire another at least... The woman's uniform consisted of a white long sleeve shirt, a black bow tie cinched at her throat over which was a matching waistcoat with a nameplate on her left breast that read "Annie", with black slacks and black laced sensible shoes. As the last of her champagne left her platter, Ellana observed the girl pick her way through the guard clutching something in her pocket as she walked past her into a back alley. Sensing an opportunity peeled from the red carpet, following her a wide grin on her face.



Annie Mi-Young took a calming suck on her atomiser, leaned against a dumpster in the alley beside the Dolby Theatre, letting out a relieved sigh as she felt the taste of strawberry nicotine on her tongue. She was nervous not because of rubbing shoulders with all these famous celebrities, who collectively had more money than she or her family would ever see. No she was wondering just how much OSCAR'S tableware she could smuggle out. Annie had a contact in the kitchens, the plan being to smuggle out the merchandise when everyone was busy during the awards ceremony. As she blew out a stream of blue smoke, Annie saw a pretty red headed woman in a strapless little black dress, a press pass hung around her neck along with a camera. Wow she as a nice rack, but doesn't she know she's not allowed back here? Annie folded her arms across her small A-cups, as she regarded the woman. "Are you okay? You lost, babe?" The red head just smiled raising her hand. "Lost? No I'am right where I need to be...Annie" Reading her name tag she caressed Annie's cheek, the young waitress felt waves of calm arousal as she let out a breath of desire. The redhead then lent in taking Annie into her arms planting a passionate kiss on the girls lips. Mmm..I love redheads, this as made my night. Annie as she passionately returned the kiss feeling her eyes roll into the back of her head, slumping unconscious in the redheads arms letting out a long sigh. With Meredith's dress hanging loose from her new petite frame, Ellana lowered the pretty waitress onto the ground. "Annie Mi-Young, 23, OSCAR's Waitress. She's a kleptomaniac. And had planned to steal a load of tableware from the ceremony so could could sell it online, to raise money to pay her mother's medical bills." She smiled as she stripped off Meredith's clothes.


Kneeling by the unconscious waitress Ellana took out her ear studs inserting them in before unlacing her shoes, slipping them off her feet along with pink cotton ankle socks. After loosening Annie's bow tie, Ellana unbuttoned the girls waistcoat unfolding it pulling it loose from her body followed by her shirt. Revealing a pink lace trim camisole covering her small breasts. Unfastening the waitresses trousers Ellana worked them free of her slender hips peeling them down her long tanned legs, exposing a matching tanga thong covering her modesty. Whipping these down from between Annie's thighs gave Ellana a good glimpse of the waitresses small brown clitoris crowned with a thick strip of light brown hair. Pulling up the stolen panties, Ellana stripped off the rest of Annie's shirt before flicking the girls arms up pulling her camisole up over her head. Ellana admired Annie's small but well rounded cute A-cups with perky dark brown areolas as she pulled on the camisole. She quickly dressed in Annie's uniform, pulling on the bow tie buttoning up the waistcoat. When she was finished, Ellana tore Meredith's dress into strips binding the naked petite waitresses limbs and gagging her. Scooping up the girl's body in her arms Ellana tipped her into the dumpster tossing the atomiser, along with everything that had belonged to Meredith in with her. Snapping the lid shut, Ellana entered the Dolby Theatre through the service door.



The Dolby Theatre, OSCARs night 20:30pm


For the next half an hour, Ellana had decided to play the part of Annie the waitress. Serving drinks to the glamorous men and women who were mingling in the large antechamber, waiting for the ceremony to begin. I need to replace one of these actresses. That should get me into the awards ceremony, but I need an opening As she scanned the area looking for a suitable candidate Ellana noticed some human sized gold statues scattered here and there. Hmm? Is that OSCAR? He can't be a golden expressionless male? Its good of him to hand out these statues of himself though. But don't humans know gold is useless? You can't do anything with it. Platinum as more value The sight of an actress peeling off from the group caught Ellana's attention. Getting closer, Ellana appraised her. She was a striking middle aged human female with peculiar sculptured features, unnaturally high cheekbones and big brown almond shaped eyes. Her dark black hair done up in a high ponytail. The woman had large breasts that were spilling from her black diamond sequined dress. She wore matching strappy heels, her neck adorned with a diamond choker with dangling earrings. Clutching a small diamond studded bag . It looked like she was making her way to the ladies bathroom. There's my new form, but something is off about her. Well better than nothing... Serving the rest of her champagne, Ellana set down her empty platter following the brunette into the bathroom.



Kim Kardashian let out a relieved sigh as she emptied her bladder into the toilet bowl, her expensive Christian Dior dress and black diamante G-string down around her ankles. Man, I love OSCARs night. But damn would it kill them to get better champagne? This stuff goes right through me and I'm already starting to see double.. Kim thought as she heard the door to the bathroom opening, the new arrival stopping to wait outside her cubicle. That's odd? Probably another fan wanting another autograph. It's not the first time I have been accosted in the toilet by a fan. Won't be the last. After wiping herself down, and flushing the toilet Kim pulled up her dress opening the cubicle to see a pretty young Asian waitress. Her nametag read "Annie" Kim flashed her a smile with her fake lips. "Hi... Annie? Are you a fan of mine by any chance? Would like an autograph?" She took out her pen as the waitress flashed her a wide grin. "No that won't be necessary. Your dress will suffice." Annie advanced into the cubicle caressing Kim's cheek as she closed the door behind her. Kim let out an aroused sigh feeling attracted to the waitress as she kissed her heavily on her pouted lips, unzipping her dress loosening the straps off her shoulders letting it fall to the floor. Sitting down on the toilet bowl in nothing but her underwear and jewellery, Kim was straddled by the pretty waitress, returning her kiss. It's been a while since I had been kissed by another girl. Most stay away since I had the operations... was her last thought as she slumped unconscious in the waitresses arms. "Kim Kardashian, 43, Actress, TV personality. She hates her boobs and is thinking of having them sized down back to her natural C-cups. What a second?" Ellana not quite a perfect copy of Kim Kardashian looked down at her body, then at Kim's.


"We don't match?! How is this possible? This has never happened before!" Confused Ellana removed Kim's jewellery, including a navel piercing putting in on before whipping off her thong, exposing a full clean shaven womanhood. After pulling up the thong and strapping on the heels, Ellana felt Kim's boobs, with small circular dark pink areolas, then her's finding the problem. "Damn it! Implants?! Humans want to enhance themselves? Why? It makes my job harder. Damn you Kim Kardashian! " She shouted at the unconscious actress as she bound the naked woman with torn strips from Annie's camisole before gagging her with the panties. I'am her but what she looked like before she had her lips, breasts, buttocks and face done. Scooping up the woman's dress, along with Annie's uniform Ellana dragged the naked Kim into the attendants cupboard. After propping up the naked actress against the far wall, Ellana stepped into the dress trying to zip it up. "Damn it all! It doesn't fit what I'am I going to do now!? She yelled resisting the urge to kick the unconscious naked Kim Kardashian. Suddenly from behind the door, Ellana heard a sound that told her another woman had entered the bathroom. Well it seems my luck as changed. I hope she is 100% natural or this is going to be a very short night. Taking a deep breath, Ellana walked out.



As she was applying deep red lipstick to her natural lips, Jennifer Lawrence jumped at the peculiar sight of Kim Kardashian emerging from the attendants cupboard, in a state of undress. Oddly she looked like she was a breast size down and looked way more attractive without the enhancements . "Uh, hi KK. You look a little different? Did you have another operation?" KK just smiled, cocking her head. "No but you are perfectly natural." Suddenly Kim pulled her by the front of her dress into the attendants cupboard behind her. "Hey! Steady on Kim! I'am not kind of g-mmph!" Jennifer was pinned to the wall by Kim's mouth as the older woman closed the door behind them. She tried to resist but felt a wave of calm wash over her as Kim's tongue probed her mouth. Jennifer despite herself returned the kiss, as Kim unzipped her dress from the rear, letting it fall to the floor. I didn't think I was that type of girl? I have never down anything remotely lesbian. But why does this feel so natural... Jennifer's eyes rolled back into her head, as she let out a low sigh sliding unconscious down the wall, wearing nothing but her backless and strapless red lace B-cup bra with matching red lace G-string. Ellana now wearing the face of Jennifer Lawrence smiled. "Jennifer Lawrence, 33, Actress. Has never seen "Keeping up with the Kardashians" and she thinks that they are a family of talentless no hopers, whose brains are in their fake tits." She began to strip off Kim's dress as the real Kim behind her woke up.



As Ellana removed Jennifer's jewellery putting it on herself, behind her the naked Kim Kardashian screamed into her panty gag. " You know this isn't my fault, Kim. It's yours. If you hadn't ruined my evening then your friend Jennifer would still be enjoying hers, now silence." Ellana said without turned to face her as she slipped off Jennifer's heels. The woman then began to weep confused sobs shaking her head. Ignoring Kim, Ellana loosened the actresses hair copying her knot before reaching around her back unclasping her bra revealing Jennifer's B-cups with full puffy light pink areolas. Admiring the actresses real breasts, Ellana clasped on her bra then whipped off her G-string thong exposing Jennifer's small clitoris decorated with a trimmed strip of light brown pubic hair. Ellana could still hear Kim's sobs through her gag as she finished getting dressed. Her sobs getting louder as Ellana tore up the expensive diamond dress binding and gagging the unconscious naked Jennifer Lawrence. Ellana dragged the slim attractive actress over to Kim, propping her up next to the screaming sobbing Kim. Ellana grinned as she looked down on the two naked actresses, Jennifer looking cute with her head on Kim's shoulder, sleeping. "Relax, Kim. My friends will sort this out, no need to worry about bad publicity. Besides, this is nobodies fault but yours! You really had to ruin my and your friends evening, hadn't you? Farewell." She flashed the bemused actress a wave before swelling from the cupboard. In the darkness Kim thought How much did I have to drink? Did that really just happen to me? Were there really two J-Law's? No its just the champagne. I hope...


Before she left the bathroom, Ellana stopped to apply Jennifer's makeup before looping the handbag over her shoulder. "Now time for my starring role." She said to her reflection.


The Awards Ceremony 21:00pm

Ellana in the form of Jennifer Lawrence filed in with the other luminaries of Hollywood as they took their seats around the huge chamber dotted with tables and chairs, lined with more of those strange golden statues. Ellana had sat down next to a short middle aged dark haired human male with a large nose and a handsome dark skinned couple, a man with cropped hair and goatee beard and a woman with a tousle of spiky short black hair. Then suddenly the lights dimmed, the stage lit by a single spotlight. "Ladies and Gentlemen! Please give a round of applause for tonight's host! Jimmy Kimmel!" Ellana flashed a confused face to her table mates as a tall dark haired human male with a bushy moustache bounced out from behind the red curtain. What? Isn't OSCAR hosting his own awards ceremony? Who's this guy? The man took a bow and clapped his hands together. "Well I'am blinded by all these stars in the room! Good god!" The crowd let out a laugh at he joke that Ellana just didn't get. "Well let's get this show on the road. Before I ruin the evening with more bad jokes!" I couldn't agree more. Get on with with it Ellana thought as a pretty blonde woman in a tight black dress emerged from behind him with a gold statuette that resembled its larger kin. "Okay! The award for the Best Actor..." Ellana turned to the man with large nose. "So who is this OSCAR? Where is he? And is he made of gold?" The man shook his head laughing. "Are you feeling alright, Jennifer? You have already won one remember?And I'am pretty sure he isn't made of gold? Isn't that right Will?" He turned to the clapping black man. "Yeah, that's right. Tom." The woman merely smiled. "I'am sure Jennifer is just feeling the effects of that crappy champagne. Well, at least that asshole Chris Rock isn't here to fuck things up." Will flashed a dark look to his wife. "I thought we put that behind us, Jada?" Before Jada could reply the drum roll ended. "The winner is Tom Cruise! Mission Impossible:- Dead Reckoning!" The man next to Ellana smoothed his hair. "If you excuse me, ladies and gents." He said getting out of his chair to accept his award.



After an hour of boredom watching these self opinionated people rise to get their awards and giving very elaborate speeches for receiving a useless hunk of gold, Ellana tensed as it came around to the "Best Actress Award." If I win then they will expect to give a speech. Well I give them one. That should get the MiB running and allow them to recapture me. I need to complete Kremm's training and complete my first volume "Okay folks! This is the award you have all been waiting for. Well I know I have." Again more sycophantic laugher as Jimmy read from the card. "Tonight's nominees are "Jennifer Lawrence for The Colour of Moonlight , Kim Kardashian for Light Falls on Sentinel , Noomi Rapace for Stockholm Syndrome and Rebecca Ferguson for Catherine Parr: The Untold Story. . A drum roll please, maestro!" He signalled to an invisible presence to his left hand side, as a long drum roll sounded. For what seemed like an eternity he called out a name. "And the winner is Jennifer Lawrence! The Colour of Moonlight! The whole audience clapped and cheered, as the spotlight fell on her. Momentarily stunned, Ellana quickly got into her role. She took a bow before walking onto the stage.



"Well congratulations Jennifer, that's what your second OSCAR? So you going to give us a little speech." Ellana smiled as she approached the podium with a mike attached, to the cries of "speech!" from the audience. Clearing her throat Ellana lent into the microphone, caressing the statuette. "Wow! What a really pretty statuette, and it's made of gold!" The audience stayed silent as she continued. "Awfully nice of this OSCAR to make these statues and give them to people. I wonder why he is not here in person at his own ceremony." There were hushed voices and murmuring from the crowd, even Jimmy Kimmel was speechless as Ellana picked up the statue feeling the weight. "What am I supposed to do with this pretty statue? Use it as a doorstop? Gold is practically useless!" Seeing two black suited figures enter from the rear of the room, Ellana smiled pressing on putting down the OSCAR. "Well, I would like to thank my mum and my dad they are royalty you know? I would never had been here enjoying tonight if it wasn't for them and their support." Their were shocked murmurings from the audience as agents L & M pick their way through the crowd towards her.


"That's enough Miss Lawrence, you have had a little too much to drink. Time to go." L said as she walked onto the stage with M by her shoulder. "Your limo's waiting, Princess." Ellana smiled shaking her head as she walked around the podium. "It took you guys long enough. You usually need more clues. Hey everyone!" She span around holding her hands out, gesturing to the two agents. "These are my good friends! L & M, from the MiB, they are quite incompetent. I think it's those shades they wear." There was a laugh that rose from the audience. "You won't remember them or me from tonight. They will zap you and steal your memories." L flushed a bright shade of red as she advanced on Ellana. " That's it! We were going to take you out by the red carpet. But for that! It's the back door for you!" She grabbed Ellana roughly by her left forearm roughly dragging her off the stage, a hushed cry of shock rose from the audience and Jimmy Kimmel. M laid her hand on the older agents shoulder. " Er, boss." She pointed at the news camera's around the back of the room. "We are on camera assaulting Jennifer Lawrence in front of the world. Ease off or even neuralysers won't be enough." Ellana smiled widely as L saw that she had led into a trap. Nodding the older agent relaxed her grip as she walked gently off the stage. But not before Ellana rushed back collecting her OSCAR, earning her another fierce look from the two agents as she was escorted out. "Call it a souvenir."




Outside the Dolby Theatre 22:30pm


Striding down the red carpet as photographers snapped their pictures, the two agents sat Ellana onto the back seat of the now familiar MiB Sedan. "Rookie, better call headquarters. We need at least four support teams to neuralyse everyone. This is an even bigger mess then the UN." As M nodded taking out her communicator Ellana rubbed her cuffed hands together. "Well back to New York it is. I have a ton of work to get through and tonight was spectacular!" The two agents looked at her groaning as L switched on the engine pulling away. Ellana turned looking back at the receding Dolby Theatre. "You know guys. I still never did find out who this OSCAR was?"

[Stormtrooper1990]

LA SHOWBIZ WEEKLY


JENNIFER LAWRENCE IN OSCARS SHAME


By Mandy Arroyo, Showbiz Correspondent


The 96th Academy Awards ended on an embarrassing note for Jennifer Lawrence last night, when the actress gave a drunken speech to end all drunken speeches. Ms Lawrence, 33 had won only her second Best Actress OSCAR for her stunning performance in frontier epic The Colour of Moonlight when she gave a memorable speech. Where the outspoken actress called out the futility of the Academy Awards. She also thanked her parents for helping her with her career. The Lawrence's while in Tinseltown were unavailable to comment on their daughter's antics. J-Law was later escorted off by her security team.


In related news the actress and TV personality Kim Kardashian was found in one of the women's bathroom being outrageously sick after consuming too much OSCARs champagne. It seems that J-Law isn't the only one who can't hold her liquor. And Kim certainly did miss a very memorable night. Showbiz weekly as tried to hit up the Kardashian family for a comment but so far they have not returned our calls.


For a full list of OSCARs winners and losers, please turn to page 5.

[Stormtrooper1990]

Here are our two very unfortunate celebs who spent OSCARs night in a broom cupboard courtesy of Ellana

Kim Kardashian

https://media.vogue.co.uk/photos/65e4b6 ... 0(1)5.jpeg


Jennifer Lawrence


https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/im ... 650471.jpg

[meditions142]

Oh Ellana is really, really causing trouble now. The MiB is going to have a harder and harder time keeping her a secret!

And by the way, the "enhancements" not transferring was a fabulous and really funny addition to the story/

Thanks as always for your hard work and willingness to share your stories with the community.

[Stormtrooper1990]

Oh Ellana is really, really causing trouble now. The MiB is going to have a harder and harder time keeping her a secret!

And by the way, the "enhancements" not transferring was a fabulous and really funny addition to the story/

Thanks as always for your hard work and willingness to share your stories with the community.

Hi Meditions


That she most certainly is. If the MiB thinks they have it bad know, wait until Ellana as her summer holidays There's also the small matter of the Olympic games... She's going to have a very fun packed summer, utilising her new skills and going on another globetrotting adventure. There will also be an upcoming chapter that focuses solely on the MiB themselves.


Thank you my friend. Its the only limitation on Ellana's abilities, that she cannot replicate anything artificial. So Kim's breast implants and all the other work she has had done didn't come through. Leading to a very bemused Jennifer Lawrence who thought KK looked a little different Of course for now one Ellana will only replace, natural beautiful women.


You are most welcome. Its always a pleasure to share my stories with the board and I really appreciate your support, my friend. Thank you.

There is more to come.

[meditions142]

And of course you gave me a chance to imagine a scene when you describe in the intro: "An explosive distraction by Kremm drew my guards away".

You leave it to the imagination of what happened so I like to imagine a couple MiB female guards ended up getting Zenobian Neck Pinches as part of the "distraction".

[Stormtrooper1990]

And of course you gave me a chance to imagine a scene when you describe in the intro: "An explosive distraction by Kremm drew my guards away".

You leave it to the imagination of what happened so I like to imagine a couple MiB female guards ended up getting Zenobian Neck Pinches as part of the "distraction".

No worries my friend, I'am glad I could make that happen.


Indeed, there were a couple of unfortunate female guards guarding an equipment room. Kremm lured one away with a little clicker, and pulled her around the corner into a broom cupboard. After that one was given the Nerve Pinch, her friend got a little jumpy and panicked then soon followed their friend, in more ways then one. Kremm then destroyed the aircon unit followed by a transformer, which drew Ellana's guards away powered down her cell and the escape was on.

The two guards were found slumped shoulder to shoulder sleeping in the broom cupboard. And were later neuralysed then reassigned to separate watches.

[meditions142]

Indeed, there were a couple of unfortunate female guards guarding an equipment room. Kremm lured one away with a little clicker, and pulled her around the corner into a broom cupboard. After that one was given the Nerve Pinch, her friend got a little jumpy and panicked then soon followed their friend, in more ways then one. Kremm then destroyed the aircon unit followed by a transformer, which drew Ellana's guards away powered down her cell and the escape was on.

The two guards were found slumped shoulder to shoulder sleeping in the broom cupboard. And were later neuralysed then reassigned to separate watches.

What a perfect scene! Kremm tricks the first woman with the old "strange noise" trick and lures her into his trap. Then the second woman gets concerned her colleague has not returned, but, instead of calling for backup, she also walks right into Kremm's clutches.

Perfect "dumb guard" scenes. Both woman pay for their cluelessness by suddenly feeling a sharp pain in their necks followed by a trip to slumberland

[meditions142]

Indeed, there were a couple of unfortunate female guards guarding an equipment room. Kremm lured one away with a little clicker, and pulled her around the corner into a broom cupboard. After that one was given the Nerve Pinch, her friend got a little jumpy and panicked then soon followed their friend, in more ways then one. Kremm then destroyed the aircon unit followed by a transformer, which drew Ellana's guards away powered down her cell and the escape was on.

The two guards were found slumped shoulder to shoulder sleeping in the broom cupboard. And were later neuralysed then reassigned to separate watches.

What a perfect scene! Kremm tricks the first woman with the old "strange noise" trick and lures her into his trap. Then the second woman gets concerned her colleague has not returned, but, instead of calling for backup, she also walks right into Kremm's clutches.

Perfect "dumb guard" scenes. Both woman pay for their cluelessness by suddenly feeling a sharp pain in their necks followed by a trip to slumberland. Poor girls!

[meditions142]

Indeed, there were a couple of unfortunate female guards guarding an equipment room. Kremm lured one away with a little clicker, and pulled her around the corner into a broom cupboard. After that one was given the Nerve Pinch, her friend got a little jumpy and panicked then soon followed their friend, in more ways then one. Kremm then destroyed the aircon unit followed by a transformer, which drew Ellana's guards away powered down her cell and the escape was on.

The two guards were found slumped shoulder to shoulder sleeping in the broom cupboard. And were later neuralysed then reassigned to separate watches.

What a perfect scene! Kremm tricks the first woman with the old "strange noise" trick and lures her into his trap. Then the second woman gets concerned her colleague has not returned, but, instead of calling for backup, she also walks right into Kremm's clutches.

Perfect "dumb guard" scenes. Both woman pay for their cluelessness by suddenly feeling a sharp pain in their necks followed by a trip to slumberland. Poor girls!