Pakal

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esercito sconfitto
Posts: 8051
Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2016 12:06 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by esercito sconfitto »

I love everything, the characters ( Coulter as mage and Yuka as shapeshifter is an original combination) the pace... we rarely can read stories describing a fortress infiltration so convincing and fast

If I can suggest you...edit the text and ADD the erased parts about the background lore building

please don't leave this formula, it works, it's really enjoyable :D


...and continue with these four ( five, with the slave girl?) protagonists! at least another short tale!
Blue-Cynthia
Posts: 311
Joined: Fri Jun 03, 2016 12:51 am

Re: Pakal

Post by Blue-Cynthia »

I share your thoughts about world-building. Genres like fantasy, steampunk, sci-fi and dystopia are indeed interesting types of settings for the opportunities of new types of clothes they provide. I remember the commission, and yes indeed it was interesting to see types of clothes rarely stolen (especially liked Sisila's WWI-inspired clothes; though the more anime-like suit worn by the woman wearing the glasses ambushed in the locker room was also good - has an Evangelion-vibe).
I do have another commission from the same artist that will be worked on in the coming months. I can share the set of characters with you that will be used which is double that of the previous commission and a bit more complex story wise.
meditions142
Posts: 1971
Joined: Fri Jun 01, 2018 2:51 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by meditions142 »

rufusluciusivan wrote: Mon Sep 21, 2020 6:38 pm
I am curious how it actually works.
Magic. ;) Probably electrical magic, but magic nevertheless. I didn't envision it as necessarily painful, more like causing a very strange unusual sensation.
Thanks for the explanation! I just love the scene. The way Yuka neutralizes the young guard with just a touch is just so great.
rufusluciusivan
Posts: 1571
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2017 5:08 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by rufusluciusivan »

esercito sconfitto: Given the fact that people either like this formula of adding lore building or aren't bothered by it, I certainly won't give up on this formula. ;) As for the removed details, I think it'll be easier to add them in another part. In hindsight, they truly were interrupting the flow of the story. I have a few ideas with these characters, so hopefully this won't be the last time you see them, though I may be slower to update from now. Glad you enjoyed them all (even Coulter and her bad attitude :lol: ).

Blue-Cynthia: I'd be interested indeed...

(You're welcome meditions. ;) )
Trackman281
Posts: 1720
Joined: Fri Jun 01, 2018 6:08 am

Re: Pakal

Post by Trackman281 »

I didn't expect you to post a new story so soon and after reading through your message at the beginning, I can tell this is going to be another ARC I'm going to love. I love fantasy and sci-fi settings too so I can tell I'm really going to enjoy this, anyway enough talk, let's take a look at your first chapter. :D

Well right of the bat I'm already loving the setting and the classic fantasy style uniforms from the guards, I haven't read the other replies yet, because I don't to spoil anything for myself, so you may of already answered this question, but could this be some sort of alternate universe from your other stories as I see one of the main characters is called Yuka? Although if you just like the name then that's cool as is it a pretty good name. :)

Aaahh I see Yuka's a shapeshifter, this is great as their really aren't many shapeshifters in the story section of this board. :)

I loved the entire scene with the guard and Yuka, it wasn't rushed and it gave us a great look into Yuka's shape shifting abilities with great detail, not to mention the guards overall reaction nicely done. :D

I see Yuka's morality is in the grey zone, which is great because now it's open to multiple scenario's and moral choices hopefully in future chapter, and hopefully in future chapters we will get to learn more about this Pakal empire as I have envisioned what the empire itself must look like (hint, hint. I really want more chapters already ;) ) :D :D

Just a side note, I like the guards medieval fantasy style underwear too. :)

Coulter the mage is an interesting character, does this mean she will able to perform bondage spells or some sort of hypnotic spells, Coulter leaves the door open for dozens of possibilities and I really hope we get to see her utilize some of them in the future. :?: :)

The rivalry between Coulter and Yuka is good as well, it does put a smile on my face when two rivals are forced to work together, plus I like the little jabs at each other here and there, it definitely gives the story life. :D

Although with saying this I believe Azeneth is going to be my favourite character in this ARC, her sense of humour, whether it's unintentional or not is just Great and her style coupled with her personality really shines through. :D :D

WOW! Now that is how you do follow up scene with Coulter and Yisüi, that was incredibly well written and I genuinely thought she was going to be saved because Yuka was hiding in the crowd Assassin's creed style before stopping it with a throwing knife or something, but what you did with Coulter raining down fire was so much better, I tip my hat you took a gamble with this scene and it paid of greatly. :D

Also I could be wrong but I've never seen an executioner being replaced for her uniform, so I believe this is a brand new idea, very nice. :)

Seriously I know I said this before, but I'm loving the rivalry between Coulter and Yuka and there stand off they just had was great, both women made equally valid points in there bout as well which left things at a stalemate, reminds me so much so much of Tina and CI-1262 (who I really need to give a name too). Please keep their rivalry going for as long as you can because I'm thoroughly enjoying it. 8-) :D

Nice finishing scene as well with Azeneth and Yuka recreating a typical replacement scene with each other, I may be wrong but do I detect a spark between those two for a future relationship to blossom or am I just reading too deep into it and you have something tucked up your sleeve for them in the future I wonder. :?: :D

Well this was a fantastic beginning to a wonderful and very interesting new ARC. I love the world and the characters, you went all out with the fantasy setting which is definitely a good thing and to be honest a very welcomed new approach. The characters were all written spectacularly and all had there own unique quirks and charms. It was great letting my mind run wild and imagining the world that Yuka inhabits, needless to say I would love to see future chapters as I think your onto another masterpiece with this, I'm also looking forward to hearing more about this world's lore as I can tell this new world is rich with history and tales and I can't wait to hear about them. Brilliant chapter. :D :D
rufusluciusivan
Posts: 1571
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2017 5:08 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by rufusluciusivan »

So many comments. This is just insane. ;) Thank you!

I actually started writing this story while also writing the last parts of Final Gambits. Therefore, after Final Gambits was finished, part of this new story was already written, hence the quick update. However, I probably won't be able to keep the same rhythm: work is going to eat up a lot of my time in the coming weeks/months.

This story uses unseen barely-mentioned locations of my previous stories (Lucina and Selena visit Pakal in Final Gambits), though you can consider it a fantasy alternate universe. Yuka's name is a coincidence though. (The character was conceived long before Yuki; I even hesitated to change Yuka's name due to their similarities, but I couldn't imagine the character with an other name.)

I indeed chose a fantasy setting precisely to have some fun with things that can't be featured in a more realistic setting: medieval-like clothes (and underwear), magic and shapeshifting powers...

Coulter's powers are mostly destructive. A bondage spell isn't out of the equation, given the fact that she was able to truss up Yuka 'with nothing'. Hypnosis is a lot less likely: mage powers are mostly geared towards violence and destruction, with illusions being the major exception... (In fact, to immobilize Yuka, she got creative with her powers; as the shapeshifter understood, Coulter could have crushed her with the force immobilizing her – and it's actually the point of the spell...)

Azeneth is a ton of fun to write even though her role in the story is more 'support secondary character'. In many regards, she's Coulter's foil: she faced the same trauma, but she reacted differently.

Coulter likes to make it big and loud. Of course she would take this opportunity to fry someone. The point was also to showcase how risky brining her in a mission is, even though she's a powerhouse if a fight breaks out and the best way to flee a place. If she can force the hand of her teammates to kill a Mage, she will do it.

An executioner is indeed (at my knowledge) a complete novelty on this Board.

Yuka's and Coulter's rivalry / duality will be one of the cores of the story, so you can expect to see more of it.

Yuka is straight, so it truly was in all friendship. ;)

Given the numerous comments I received, I think I will focus on this project. ;) Thank you everyone!
Last edited by rufusluciusivan on Mon Sep 28, 2020 8:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
meditions142
Posts: 1971
Joined: Fri Jun 01, 2018 2:51 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by meditions142 »

Trackman281 wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:18 am
Just a side note, I like the guards medieval fantasy style underwear too. :)

Trackman you and I think a lot alike. The image I conjoined up of the guard being tied up and the dragged off to the guardhouse wearing nothing but a loincloth and a strip of material to cover her breasts was really sexy.
rufusluciusivan
Posts: 1571
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2017 5:08 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by rufusluciusivan »

Hello everyone! This new post will be a little different than usual, I wanted to experiment something. (Not saying more here.) It's more something akin to an interlude between the first and second stories.

Interlude


Don't use your powers. Don't ever use them or they will sense you. Hide. Hide and survive.

This was the last thing her mother said to her.

Coulter was alone.

She walking aimlessly in the hills. It was the early morning, therefore the weather still wasn't too hot – only warm. However, she knew that things were soon going to change. During summer, days were scorching hot in the Hills of Tecuehtitlan.

The red-haired teenager had found a trail, used by travellers and merchants, and was currently following it because she had no better idea. Only her obstinacy and her anger were giving her the strength to keep walking. She had no other goal than to put as much distance as possible between she and the site of the massacre. Her uncle Moulder's wagon train used to be one of the most prosperous Charioteer wagon trains of the continent. Now, only smoking debris and charred corpses remained.

In the wreckage, the red-haired teenager found two gourds of water, a purse of coins, a bag and a few sets of spare clothes that she could also use as a blanket; as well as a knife, a sling, and a few projectiles. These specific projectiles weren't stones, as they weren't made to seriously harm or to kill someone. Their goal was to daze and knock out someone. Coulter didn't know how they were made, as their fabrication was a secret of Charioteer artisans. She only knew that, at least on the outside, they were made of leather.

They weren't impressive weapons, but they were still better than nothing.

Coulter was alone.

She looked at the knife. In spirit, she witnessed herself plunge the blade in the throat of the woman who sold them off to the Mages. Pleasant idea...

The merchant was wearing a colourful red Pakal huipil with yellow and blue stripes that was reaching up to the knees, a green cloth sash, and a blue skirt with yellow threads. her head was covered with a dark blue cinta. Coulter wasn't able to remember much more about her, except her deep emerald green eyes and her engaging smile.

She drank their water, ate their food. She said to them: “I must say, I really appreciate your hospitality. You have my gratitude.”

Then she gave away their position to the Mages.


The Mages who killed everyone because of Coulter... Because of the power pulsating through her veins...

The red-haired teenager held back her tears. She was alone.

Suddenly, Coulter heard a faint noise.

The teenager immediately grabbed her sling and a projectile.

“Who's there?” she asked.

The noise was coming from a hollow beyond a small hill, away from the trail.

Coulter warily approached.

The noise was becoming louder but, strangely, it still seemed as if it was muffled by something.

The red-haired teenager looked in the hollow. Her eyes widened.

“What?” she exclaimed.

There was a woman. A thouroughly trussed up and gagged woman. A thouroughly trussed up and gagged almost naked woman.

“WHAT?!”

The woman was a subject of the Empire. She had coarse black hair, dark brown eyes, and a tanned copper-looking skin (though lighter than a Charioteer's skin). Her hair were tied into an axtlacuilli coiffure. She was only wearing undergarments: a light grey short-sleeved cotton chemise and a grey loincloth. In spite of the situation, Coulter couldn't help but find it strange that she was using a traditional Pakal loincloth to cover the lower part of her body, but was at the same time wearing underwear following the fashion of these weird countries from across the ocean to cover the top half of her body.

A big thick piece of cloth was shoved inside the black-haired woman's mouth, and a rag was tied over her mouth to prevent her from spitting the gag. She was bound with ropes. Her legs were tied from the ankles to the knees. Her wrists were crossed behind her back and bound. Finally, ropes were wrapped around her upper-body to immobilize her arms.

The black-haired woman was looking at the teenager with red teary eyes. She pleadingly mewled in her gag.

“Who are you?” Coulter asked the woman after pulling off the cloth gag.

The latter spat the rag inside her mouth. “I'm Eztli! I'm a travelling merchant!” the hysterical woman answered. “I was supposed to meet up with Moulder's wagon train to trade goods, but a woman ambushed me! She stole my merchandise, my cart, and even my clothes! I've been here all night!”

Coulter held back her tears. “Moulder's wagon train has been slaughtered. I'm the only one left.” she blankly explained.

The merchant stopped feeling sorry for herself.

“I... I apologize for...”

“I will free you.” Coulter interrupted her.

She used her knife to cut the ropes binding the woman's arms and wrists.

“My name is Coulter by the way. You were lucky I came across you. Your attacker left you with no water...”

“Thank you!” Eztli massaged her wrists.

She was looking over Coulter.

The teenager wondered how the merchant was feeling about her savior: a lanky skinny Charioteer teenager with messy loose armpit-long red hair, bruises on her dark skin, and who was smelling of smoke.

“Do you know who did that to you?” Coulter asked Eztli while cutting the ropes binding the woman's legs

“No. I don't even know why she ambushed me...”

“What did she look like?”

“She was wearing a priestess robe. She had deep emerald green eyes and braided deep black hair, but I'm sure the black was a dye. She was tanned, but her skin was not as dark as a Pakal woman's skin. She told me she was a wandering priestess on a pilgrimage, and asked me if she could travel with me on my cart until we reached the next town. Shortly before we reached Moulder's wagon train, she asked to make a halt. I complied: I wanted to check my merchandise before reaching the wagon train anyway. When I had my back turned, she grabbed me from behind, and wrapped her arms around my throat. I've never seen such a technique! She was blocking my head with her hold and squeezing my neck and my throat. Before I could even understand what was going on, I lost consciousness. And when I woke up, I was in that hollow. Trussed up and robbed of everything. But why would you want to know the identity of this thief?”

“She helped the slaughter of my wagon train.” Coulter retorted. “She stole your cart, your clothes and your identity, disguised herself, and infiltrated us. And when I find her, I will kill her.”

Eztli kept silent during a few instants. “Who attacked your wagon train?” she finally asked.

“It was... bandits.” Coulter lied. Charioteers weren't well-liked in the Empire; and even though their spy mugged Eztli, the red-haired teenager didn't know if the merchant was favourable to the Mages or not. She quickly changed the subject: “Can you walk?”

“I will need clothes! I can't walk in the wilderness half-naked!” Eztli objected. “Do you think we can find something in the...” She hesitated. “... in the remains of the wagon train?”

Coulter bit her lips. She couldn't let Eztli see the wreckage, or the merchant would immediately understand that Mages were responsible of the slaughter.

“They burnt almost everything. And I can't let you loot the corpse of one of my people anyway.”

“But I can't stay like this!” Eztli exclaimed while pointing at her loincloth and her light chemise.

Coulter hesitated between staying with the merchant or leaving her behind.

“Wait for me here. I will go see if I can find some clothes for you.”

**************

When she returned to the wreckage, Coulter realized that she didn't get away from it as much as she thought she did. Did she walk so slowly? Or maybe she went round in circles before finding the trail... She wasn't exactly thinking straight after all. Her mind was full of self-hatred and revenge fantasies.

The teenager nearly threw up while rummaging the site. She avoided looking at the corpses and searched though the remains of the wagons. She certainly wouldn't loot the bodies of her own people! Among the goods sold by her wagon train, there were clothes.

She managed to find a few intact clothes in a wagon that hadn't entirely burnt... as well as two other gourds full of water. She blessed her stroke of luck. Perhaps it was a sign that she should stay with Eztli? At least until they were safe.

Coulter grabbed a few sets of Charioteer clothes and shoes, to make sure to have one that would fit Eztli. She could still use the other ones as blankets.

**************

Eztli was waiting for her in the hollow. Among the clothes and shoes Coulter brought to her, they found a set that fitted her. The merchant was now wearing a white calf-long dress adorned on the top with blue and gold embroideries and a black cloth sash.

“Thank you. I feared that you may have decided to leave me behind...” she said.

Coulter chose to not tell the merchant that she considered that option.

Instead, she said: “We have to go. We don't have much water. Can you lead us to the nearest settlement?”

Eztli nodded.

**************

The sun was hot. Coulter and Eztli had to use headscarves to protect their heads from its rays.

The two unlikely companions were walking in silence to save their strength. They didn't have much water, and talking needlessly would only make them more thirsty.

However, suddenly, they heard a loud bray.

“Did you hear that?”

“Sounds like an animal...”

They deviated from the trail and climbed the nearest hill, beyond which the sounds were coming.

In the middle of a hollow, a donkey was attached by its lounge to a solitary tree. The animal was braying.

Next to it, lying on the grass, there was a woman.

She had midback-long braided black hair, though they weren't coarse. On the contrary, they seemed very light. Her skin was tanned, slightly lighter than the skin of a subject of the Empire. One of her parents was probably from the northern vassal kingdoms.

Most importantly, the woman was bound with ropes and gagged with rags. The upper-part of her torso was almost mummified with coarse ropes that were immobilizing her upper-arms. Her wrists were cross-tied behind her back. Her thighs and legs were also tied with ropes. A thick piece of cloth was tied over her mouth.

Also, she was half-naked. She was only wearing a white knee-long underdress with no shoulder straps, as it was clipped under the armpits.

It has to be the work of the emerald-eyed spy... Coulter thought to herself. It's like following a trail. Except that it's with stripped women instead of footprints... How many other victims did she leave in her wake?

Eztli and she approached the trussed up woman. The latter wasn't moving. The donkey stopped braying and looked at them. There was a spark of intelligence in the animal's eyes.

“Did it... Did it bray on purpose to lead us here?” Eztli wondered.

The red-haired teenager didn't answer, as she didn't care, and touched the woman's throat to chek pulse.

“Is she... dead...?” Eztli asked.

“She's breathing. However, I don't know how long she's been there... She needs water.”

They quickly cut the ropes and the gag. The unconscious woman weakly moaned, but didn't wake up.

“Look at the tatoos, on her shoulders. She's a priestess.”

There was indeed a black tatoo of a stylized sun on each shoulder.

“A wandering priestess, most likely.” Coulter said. “I think we discovered how the spy disguised herself as a priestess to trick you...”

“But who would dare assault a priestess?”

“We'll ask her when she wakes up. First, we have to cover her head to protect her from the sun, and to make her drink some water. She's lucky that we came across her.”

**************

They gave the woman the first care, protecting her from the sun with a headscarf and spare clothes to cover her body. They made her drink water – slowly and carefully, to make sure that she wouldn't choke on the liquid. The donkey was placidly watching them, as if it knew that its mistress was in safe hands.

The priestess finally opened her eyes.

“Who... Who are you?” she weakly asked.

“Friends.” Eztli answered.

“What about you?” Coulter asked.

“I'm... I'm Xochitl... I was travelling to Millhaco... I met with a woman... She was wearing the light grey hooded robe of a pilgrim... and carrying a pilgrim staff... She said she needed my help... But when I dismounted... she attacked me... And when I woke up...”

“She had tied you up and stolen your clothes.”

“Yes. I think she would have taken Apocoatl as well, but he refused to follow her... He's very smart.” Xochitl said while looking at the donkey.

“Did this woman have emerald green eyes?” Coulter asked.

The priestess blinked. “Yes. But how would you know?”

“She's a criminal!” Eztli intervened. “She assaulted me! And she helped the slaughter of Coulter's wagon train!”

“Anyway.” Coulter said to change the subject. “We will let you rest a little, then we will take you with us. We need to reach the nearest village before our water runs out.”

“No need to wait. Just put me on Apocoatl. I will sleep on his back.”

**************

Eztli and Coulter dressed the priestess with some spare clothes (that were similar-looking to the ones worn by Eztli) and used a headscarf to protect her head. They then sat her on the back of her donkey, and tied her on it to make sure she wouldn't fall even if she lost consciousness again.

“I don't know who this woman is, but she's heartless.” Eztli commented. “At this time of the year, nobody can last long in the Hills of Tecuehtitlan without water...”

“Of course she's heartless. She helped the slaughter of my entire wagon train.” Coulter retorted.

With a cheap cowardly tactic. Coming at us with a disguise, pretending to be our friend... and stabbing us in the back. she thought to herself.

“I'm sorry.” Eztli said. “I didn't want to...”

“Let's move.” Coulter interrupted her. “If the emerald-eyed spy assaulted another woman, I want to find her while she's still alive.”

**************

However, they didn't come across an other mugged woman. They were hoping that it was because there was no other victim, and not because they missed her.

When they reached the nearest village, a few men armed with clubs stopped them.

“Halt! Tell us who you are!” their chief said.

Eztli took a step forward and did the talking for the three of them, given the fact that Xochitl was still too weak and Coulter (as a Charioteer) probably wouldn't receive a warm welcome.

She made introductions, then she asked: “What happened?”

“A pilgrim was assaulted! In our village! We found her in her room in the inn! She was gagged, and tied hands and feet with bedsheets! And she was only wearing an undergown! She said a woman with green eyes and dressed as a peasant assaulted her! She stole her clothes, can you believe that? And you won't believe what we found next...”

“Let me guess.” Coulter intervened. “The woman with emerald green eyes had ambushed one of the peasant girls of your village, knocked her out, stolen her clothes, and left her half-naked, bound and gagged, and hidden somewhere. That's how she found the clothes that she used to fool the pilgrim.”

The chief blinked. “Well... yes! But how did you...?”

It's truly like following a trail... Coulter thought to herself.

“That woman is our enemy.” Eztli answered in her place. “She attacked me, and priestess Xochitl. And she helped the slaughter of a Charioteer wagon train.”

“I recognize the priestess.” The man said while looking respecfully at Xochitl. He then briefly glanced at the red-haired bronzed-skinned teenager who was holding Apocoatl's longe. “But what is a priestess and a respectable merchant doing with someone of her kind? And while wearing Charioteer clothes as well!”

Coulter glared at him. She clenched her fists. The anger she was keeping within her ever since the slaughter of her wagon train was now begging to be quenched. A part of her really wanted to teach this man a lesson. With her powers, it would be easy. Even though she barely had a training, she could still use her unrefined magic to crush him... She could make him squirm...

“This girl saved us from death, and gave us her water and her clothes.” Eztli intervened. “So you better treat her with more respect.”

Coulter calmed herself.

She couldn't let the Mages find her. Not before she had her revenge.

**************

They were allowed in the village.

The villagers were taking care of Xochitl, helping her recover from the ordeal.

Coulter was sitting in her corner, alone and away from anyone else.

Eztli sat next to her. “Do you know what you will do?”

Coulter gave a mean look to the children who were observing her from afar. They all cleared off.

“Leave this village as soon as I can.” she answered to the merchant.

“I mean, after that.”

“No. I don't know.” the red-haired teenager admitted.

There was a moment of silence.

“You could be my apprentice.” Eztli finally proposed. “I wouldn't be able to pay you, but you'd be fed and housed.”

Coulter looked at her with suspicion. “Why would you do that?”

“I owe you my life.” She was looking so frank...

Coulter lowered her eyes.“I can't work for you... I...” She hesitated. Her cheeks reddened a little. “I can't read Pakal.”

Eztli chuckled. “Is that all? I can teach you that, you know?”

“Really?”

Coulter realized the opportunity she had.

If she knew how to read Pakal, then she would be able to read books explaining how mage's powers worked. If she worked for a merchant, she could try to get her hands on one of these Ghazanite light purple crystals the were blocking the sight of Mages.

She could learn how to use her own powers. She could train.

She could have her revenge...

"Let's shake hands!" Coulter said.

**************

Coulter brutally opened her eyes.

A dream.

Someone was knocking on the door. The redhead sat on her bed.

“Who dares...?”

The door opened. It was Yisüi, the blond-haired slave Yuka insisted they rescued.

Coulter scratched her loose messy hair and gave her a mean stare. “What do you want? Go bother someone else!”

“Your friends are looking for you. They say there is another important infiltration mission.” Yisüi said.

Coulter groaned in annoyance. “They are not my friends.” she retorted.

The red-haired mage-woman used her powers and sent the bedsheets flying across the room. She then noticed that the blond-haired former slave was still here.

“What do you want?”

“Do you need some assistance to prepare yourself? They said you must come as quickly as possible. I'd like to help you if I can.”

“Help me? Why?”

“Because you saved my life.”

Coulter chuckled and moved her hands. The nighclothes she was wearing were removed, as if invisible hands were pulling them off. Then, her undergarments and her calf-long embroidered dress, as well as her embroidered apron and her red cloth sash, flew towards her.

“As you see, I don't need any assistance. Just go bother someone else.”

Yisüi didn't insist. She left.

Coulter used her powers to dress herself.

Another infiltration mission...

The red-haired mage-woman punched the wall and resisted the urge to destroy the furnitures around her with her powers.

I'm supposed to find an infiltrator... To find her, then crush her bones and melt her skin... Not to help another infiltrator...

Still, she had no choice but to follow their instructions like a good obedient dog... at least for now. The red-haired mage-woman was maybe powerful, but she wouldn't be able to achieve her revenge simply by running around while burning things. She needed contacts. She needed allies. She needed plans and opportunities. Only Rashid and Yuka could provide them to her.

She had to continue working for them, even if taking part in Yuka's clothes stealings made her want to gag...

Coulter quickly checked if nobody was watching her, then she opened the drawer of her cabinet. Inside, there were several catalysts, given to her by Rashid in exchange of her services. Tools designed to enhance the powers of a Mage. Normally, a Mage was only able to wear one or two at the same time. But Coulter, thanks to her tremendous power, had no such restruction. One day, she would have enough catalysts to be able to defy all the Sun Mages... and crush them.

The red-haired mage-woman didn't grab one of the catalysts though. She took a necklace. On it, there was a plaque on which the symbol of the merchant guilds was engraved, with a name in Pakal engraved below. 'Eztli'. While she was the merchant's apprentice, Coulter was always wearing it to prove her status as an official apprentice. The red-haired woman briefly wondered what her life would look like, had she chosen to remain Eztli's apprentice. She would probably be in charge of her own shop, on behalf of her employer, now... Coulter hesitated, then hid the necklace back inside the drawer.

She had to get her revenge. Even if it meant taking part in dozens of other missions involving clothes stealing...

**************

And it's done. As you could see, it was different from usual – I wanted to try a short story in which the main character would only be the witness of someone else's uniform stealings. And it was the occasion to showcase and explain an important (and controversial?) part of the Coulter's personality – her utter disdain towards infiltrators and clothes stealing in general. I may try other interludes with other characters between stories, to showcase some elements of their backstories or their personalities, and of course uniform stealings. There weren't much scenes in this interlude; it should be easier to include them with other characters. ;)
Last edited by rufusluciusivan on Wed Oct 07, 2020 10:55 am, edited 1 time in total.
esercito sconfitto
Posts: 8051
Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2016 12:06 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by esercito sconfitto »

somewhat inspired by the Fellowship of the ring with Frodo bearing the Ring like Coulter her Powers and the Black Riders like the Mages ( don't use your powers, Coulder! don't wear the ring, Frodo!)

really inspired, pun implied and intended, a wonderful reading :) my best compliments, good sir
rufusluciusivan
Posts: 1571
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2017 5:08 pm

Re: Pakal

Post by rufusluciusivan »

Glad you liked this short reading slightly different from usual. ;) I tried to figure out the pun and didn't understand it though. :)
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