Stop Clowning Around!

Post by **rufusluciusivan** » Sun Aug 23, 2026 1:14 pm

As you can easily guess, this is the follow-up to ''Clowning Around'' which can be found here: viewtopic.php?t=12966

As always, links are in the second post.

**************

In the boiler room, Hannah was feeling really angry right now.“I can’t believe it! You’re being picky?!”

“It’s not about being picky. She’s the wrong size.” Erica retorted.

She threw a caterer uniform away.

“It took me five minutes to lure that girl here!”

“Still the wrong size. Next time, don’t bring an A-cup.”

“You can just grit your teeth and bear it.”

“I can’t. My twins deserve some space.”

Hannah cursed like a sailor, exited the boiler room, slammed the door behind her, and stomped away.

Mumbling to herself, she went in the museum’s corridors to look for an other girl.

Hannah volunteered to help Erica, but she also wanted revenge on the bitch who had knocked her out, trussed her up, and stashed her.

That Erica… Their other teammates were already searching for their enemies. She was going to miss all the fun because of her!

Erica... You’re lucky you’re so sexy!

Because indeed, Hannah had felt quite aroused to be pinned against the half-naked body of her partner. Maybe she could ask the other Harleys to help her replicate the scenario?

“Excuse me.” a voice suddenly interrupted her thoughts.

Hannah shrieked. “Ah! Supergirl!”

The blonde woman standing in front of her was indeed dressed in the blue supersuit with the red-and-yellow ‘S’ logo, red long boots, red skirt with yellow edges, complete with the inimitable red cape. She had a slim body, a fair light skin, a round-shaped face, a bob cut, and cute blue eyes.

The performer smiled awkwardly. “Not the real deal. I’m part of the entertainers.” she explained

“Entertainers?”

The blonde blinked. “For the party.”

“Ah. Of-” Hannah coughed in her fist. “Of course. I- I knew it. Then what are you doing here?”

“I’m looking for the back exit. I need a little break.”

Hannah bit her lower lip. The blonde hair had to be a wig. It was the exact same shade, and shape, as the real Kara Zor-El – it was too resembling to be true. She was beginning to think of a plan.

“I see. Follow me.”

The oblivious Supergirl performer was fooled by her caterer's uniform. “Thanks. I’m Lois, by the way.”

“Hannah…” She trailed off, remembering at the last second it was no good idea to give her real name. “… Maria. Yeah, Anna-Maria. Totally Anna-Maria. And not something else.” She coughed to herself. Change the subject, change the subject. You’re supposed to be the smart one! she was frantically thinking. She spoke again: “Sooooo… Lois, uh? Kinda ironic to play Supergirl then…”

“I like the irony.”

“Yes! I like irony too!”

Gosh, this is so awkward. I sound like a total weirdo. I can’t wait to knock her out, and end this conversation.

Hannah led the performer to the boiler room.

“There. It’s after that door.”

“Thanks.” The blonde walked inside the room. She saw Erica. “Uh. Is that… duct tape?”

THUD! was the sound Lois made after Hannah knocked her out.

They dragged the entertainer further inside the boiler room, closed the door, and worked on removing the woman’s costume.

The garments proved to be stretchy and surprisingly easy to pull off.

Once they had removed everything, Hannah wrapped duct tape around the fake Supergirl’s lower face and mouth to silence her. She then taped the woman’s calves. Finally, she encased her wrists and hands in tape.

The blonde performer’s undergarments were Superman-themed. Blue knickers with the red-and-yellow S logo, and a matching triangle bra with one S-logo on each cup.

Hannah rolled her eyes. “A fangirl… Who even made those?!”

Erica finished slipping into the Supergirl costume. “Just let me grab her wig, and we’ll be on our way~”

Erica grabbed the blonde’s hair, and pulled. The hair didn’t come out.

She paused awkwardly.

“It’s not a wig… Shit!”

“Great casting though.” Hannah couldn’t help but comment.

Erica sighed, then ultimately shrugged. “Meh.” She left Lois alone, and adjusted her stolen cape.

“I can’t believe it!” Hannah shouted.

“What now?”

“When I bring you a perfectly serviceable uniform, it’s not good enough for you. But the Supergirl outfit, for which you don’t even have the right hair color, that one meets your standards?!”

“Yes. Nobody will notice. They’ll just assume I’m an other performer, or I lost my wig.”

Hannah and Erica were still bickering when they stashed the unconscious underwear-clad Lois in the same maintenance cupboard they had themselves been stashed.

They left the blonde next to a trussed up plain-looking chestnut-brown-haired young woman with a flat chest, also taped and gagged in her underwear (dull grey tank top and control briefs). She was the unlucky caterer whom Hannah had mugged for nothing, since Erica hadn’t wanted her uniform.

The two partners were still bickering when they opened the door of the boiler room.

They were startled when they came face to face with a woman.

“Gark!” Hannah exclaimed.

The woman was dressed in a Wonder Woman costume: golden tiara, red bustier with golden metal parts, blue skirt with white stars, grey metal forearms bracelets, golden knee pads, red boots, and a prop lasso strapped onto her skirt. She was slim and good-looking, with blue eyes, but smaller and less muscular than the real Wonder Woman.

“Excuse me miss. Have you seen a blonde dressed as Supergirl? I’m looking for her.”

Hannah made a conscious effort to not glance at her partner, clad in the stolen Supergirl costume of that woman’s friend.

Not that it mattered much. The performer noticed Erica standing in Hannah’s shadow.

“Wait. You’re not Lois!”

Erica smirked. “Wow. Give this girl a prize.”

The performer snarled, and took a karate stance.

Erica raised an eyebrow. “Are you… attempting to fight us?”

“I’m an orange belt! Yaha!”

Hannah side-stepped the woman’s clumsy attack, and in the same motion hit her neck with the edge of the hand. The Wonder Woman performer was knocked out by the neck-chop. She landed onto the floor with a ‘thud’, and went still.

“Nobody’s going to notice the difference, my ass.” Hannah commented.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry.” Erica eyed her sideways. “Soooooo… Wanna take her costume?”

“You bet!”

**************

The Wonder Woman costume outfit showed a lot more skin than the Supergirl one, but was ironically harder to pull off. Hannah and Erica worked together. The tiara, shoulder pads, and bracelets were easy to remove, but they had a lot more trouble with the boots, the bustier and the figure-hugging skirt.

“At least that one is wearing a wig…” Hannah commented.

The mane of black hair was indeed a wig – the woman’s real hair was auburn, and compressed under a wig cap.

The performer’s undergarments were superhero-themed: deep blue hip-huggers with white stars, and a red-and-golden full-cup bra with a Wonder Woman logo on each cup.

“I guess she and Lois weren’t friends for nothing…”

“No. seriously. Who even makes this crap?!”

Hannah dropped her caterer uniform, and got dressed in the Wonder Woman costume and accessories. She struggled a bit with the bustier and the boots, but managed to put them on. The skirt was ironically easier to put on – since it was stretchy and didn’t have metal parts. She put on the bracelets and the tiara, then used the wig to conceal her hair.

Erica whistled appreciatively between her teeth. “How do you feel?”

“Powerful and sexy. Like the real deal.”

It was no secret Harley was a Wonder Woman fan – although it meant that Quinn was as likely to team up with Diana as she was to assault her with knock-out gas to steal her costume. The Harleys were sharing her admiration for the superheroine.

Hannah and Erica bound the performer’s wrists behind her back with some cables left in the bottom of a closet, then bound her legs with other cables. They gagged her with the last remaining layers of their duct tape roll.

“Let’s stash her with her friend.” Erica proposed.

“Why?”

“Because she was looking for her. Let’s reunite them.”

“There’s already the caterer! There’s no more room in the closet!”

“We can stash ‘Flat Chest’ elsewhere.”

Hannah glared daggers at her partner. “I can’t believe it! I bet you’re doing it on purpose! Just to anger me!”

The two women huffed at each other, their faces dangerously close, and their cheeks red due to their argument.

Then, Erica grabbed Hannah by the neck, and planted a long kiss on her lips – which the latter happily returned, with tongue of course.

“When we’re done here, we’ll ask the others to bind us together… I dig the kinky bondage roleplay…” Erica whispered. She caressed Hannah’s exposed thigh, then moved her hand to grab her butt. “You’re keeping the costume, by the way.”

“Took the words out of my mouth.”

Ultimately, they did as Erica wanted – Hannah couldn’t resist the sensual groping. They dragged the flat-chested caterer into an other closet, then stashed fake Wonder Woman with fake Supergirl.

“Hopefully, they’ll enjoy the kinky bondage too…” Hannah commented.

She shut the door.

Then, she and Erica exited the boiler room.

**************

In an empty storage room, Selina and Barbara were defusing what they hoped was the last gas bomb.

In-between Selina’s caterer uniform, Barbara’s security guard uniform, and Cassandra’s cloaking device, navigating the corridors without arising suspicions had been easy.

The security team was on edge. Apparently, three of their agents had been unresponsive for quite some time. (They hadn’t noticed yet the disappearance of the guard Barbara, Selina, and Cassandra had mugged.) They however weren’t suspecting yet that the gala’s security was compromised. From what Batgirl could gather, two of the missing guards – Gladys and Phoebe – were known screw-ups, and the third one had drawn the short stick and was tasked to babysit them.

Barbara decided to wait until after the bombs were all defused before warning the staff. They looked pretty incompetent – what kind of security detail took so lightly the lack of response of three (soon-to-be four) agents?! She didn’t trust them to evacuate safely all the guests, or prevent a stampede. Plus, the redhead feared Harley may resort to drastic measures if the alarm was sounded. Sure, they had hopefully neutralized all the gas bombs, but Quinn was often carrying other nasty gadgets on her.

Barbara made a mental note to herself. She really needed to talk to her father about the calamitous performance of this party’s private security – such company shouldn’t be hired anymore.

The catering crew was similarly understaffed due to three missing members. However, they too weren’t suspecting a breach of security. That, Barbara could excuse a little. They weren’t supposed to be trained in security protocols. Plus, since all the missing caterers were women, their overseers feared they had been approached by rich perverts who were pressuring them for sexual services. This was a sad reality of Gotham’s party – even ones for charity events. Some of the rich folks attending them only did so for good PR, and were looking for any excuse to get drunk and have their way with a woman. It was a chief reason why Barbara attended to as many of these events as she could in her civilian identity. Those rich perverts were quick to fold when the daughter of the commissioner was nearby to threaten them.

Barbara sighed to herself, and focused on the task at hand. Cassandra was still concealed by her cloaking device – officially to watch their rear, unofficially to unnerve Selina by not letting her know where Black Bat was. Next to the redhead, Selina was complaining about Harley while also defusing the gas bomb.

“I can’t believe that woman’s luck… She and her girls mugged guards and caterers left and right, didn’t take any precaution, and yet nobody found out anything…”

“That’s Harley Quinn in a nutshell.” Barbara answered with a shrug. “Plus, she technically didn’t go unnoticed. We’re on the case.”

“And I will enjoy getting my hands on the clown girl and her remaining buffoons…” Catwoman muttered through gritted teeth.

Once she was done fiddling with the wires, she ripped off the detonator.

“Okay. Hopefully, that’s the last one.” Selina mentioned. “We lost precious time, but we can still do it.”

“Wow, wow! Don’t tempt-” Barbara began to warn.

Three sets of footsteps interrupted her.

“-fate.” the redhead finished.

The three women were dressed as members of the security detail. But their smiles were a dead giveaway they weren’t professional guards.

“Well, well, well… I smell two killjoys…” Antonia commented.

“Nobody likes a party pooper!” Carlita added.

Shona looked at Selina’s and Barbara’s uniforms. “I have a hunch you’re not part of the crew.”

Selina smirked. “Then call security.”

Carlita smirked back. “We both know better. There’s no need to pretend, Catgirl.”

“Catwoman, please.” Selina retorted. “But if you know who I am, then you also know I eat punks like you for breakfast.”

“I don’t think so. We have more firepower.” Carlita grabbed the gun strapped to her belt.

“A gunshot? Do you WANT to alert all the building?”

“Ha! What makes you think we care?” Carlita retorted as she drew her weapon.

She didn’t get to use it however.

Black Bat, concealed under her cloaking device, zapped and drugged Carlita by jabbing her dart-tazer gadget in her neck.

Shona and Antonia were taken aback by the sudden assault. They didn’t expect an invisible foe to attack them from behind!

Selina and Barbara did. Cassandra had kept the Black Bat suit for a reason after all (and only half of it was to piss Selina off)… They jumped the two remaining Harleys, who were still gawking at their fallen comrade.

Barbara dispatched Shona with a stomach punch followed by a neck-chop, while Selina knocked out Antonia with a kick in the guts followed by a punch to the temple. The two crooks fell at their feet, and laid still.

Cassandra turned off her cloaking device, and let Carlita’s limp unconscious body crumble onto the floor as well.

Selina dusted her hands. “Well, that’s one thing out of the way.”

“I’m bothered by what they said.” Barbara intervened.

Catwoman nodded. “You too?”

“Why wouldn’t they care about their heist? Unless... it’s a diversion.”

“My thoughts exactly. We still haven’t gotten our hands on Harley or Ivy.” Catwoman glanced at the unconscious crooks. “First, let’s deal with the Three Stooges. Quickly.”

Cassandra drugged Shona and Antonia with the same gadget as with Carlita. She then produced three pairs of bat-handcuffs.

“Care to explain why you’re restraining these three?” Selina asked. “You didn’t bother with it last time.”

“They’re still dressed as security guards.” Barbara began.

Selina deduced the rest: “But if one sees them bat-cuffed, they’ll suspect something. Batman wouldn’t cuff law enforcement.”

“Exactly.”

“Clever.”

Cassandra handcuffed the three crooks. She, Barbara, and Selina then dragged them in a corner of the room.

“Whatever Harley and Ivy’s plan is, it’s falling apart quickly.” Catwoman commented. She dropped Antonia on top of her two accomplices, and grimaced to herself. She added: “Perhaps a bit too easily.”

Barbara nodded. “Harley is short-sighted enough to concoct such half-baked scheme. Not Ivy.”

“That heist is maybe half-baked, but the bombs they’re using would’ve caused a lot of ruckus.”

“Flashy and loud. Typical Harley Quinn.”

“Typical diversion too.” Selina deduced.

“The question is… A diversion for what?”

**************

Poison Ivy was walking the corridors of the army facility’s main building. The building was everything she hated. Artificial and bland. Not one plant in sight.

Several soldiers took an intrigued glance at her, but one look at her uniform convinced them to not question her. As a lieutenant, Pamela was high enough in the hierarchy to deter any rank-and-file grunt from getting on her bad side.

Military mindset. she thought scornfully.

Now, where was the command room?

She maybe had General Vreeland under her control, but the soldiers and officer in charge of the transfer would get suspicious if he gave them counter-intuitive orders.

Unless, of course, if these people were also under her spell…

Pamela was so focused on her plan, she almost bumped into a woman who was heading the other way.

“Hey! Watch your steps, Cox.”

The officer was wearing a captain uniform. She was a tall woman with light brown hair, chestnut brown eyes, and a light skin. Her haircut was a tight neck bun.

The captain eyed Pamela. “And where are you going exactly?”

Pamela noticed a surveillance camera was filming the corridor. She couldn’t just punch the woman, and be done with it.

“I have a message for the general.” she lied.

“You don’t have the clearance to enter the control room.”

“But it’s an important-”

“I don’t care. You don’t have the clearance. Either give it to me, or leave.”

Ivy frowned.

The captain chuckled wickedly. “What? Gonna cry in Vreeland’s shoulder? Everybody knows how you got your promotion.” She made a gross sucking sound with her mouth.

Pamela had studied enough of General Vreeland’s life to know this was a lie, but she wasn’t surprised that jealous people were spreading slander. Not that she cared about the real Lieutenant Cox’s reputation, but Pamela didn’t like being the target of mockeries – even when it was aimed at a fake identity of hers.

She reminded herself of the surveillance camera to keep calm.

The captain scoffed. “Just as I thought. You’re all bluster. Don’t bother then. Your badge won’t open the door.” She brushed past Ivy. Pamela noticed she was heading to the female restrooms.

Coincidentally, the officer was wearing a uniform – and access badge – that would give her access to the control room.

Ivy refrained herself from grinning, and turned back. Then, once she was out of the camera’s reach, she changed course and entered the restrooms.

She was pleasantly surprised to find there wasn’t anyone there, save for her target who was currently in a stall. No camera either.

Ivy heard the flush. She moved in front of the stall.

When the captain opened the door, she was greeted by a grinning Pamela – who was cracking her knuckles. Ivy didn’t want to use her pheromones on that specific woman. With her, she’d do it the old-fashioned way.

The painful one.

The foolish captain failed to see the red flags. “Wow, creepy much? Men’s restrooms are on the other side, if you’re looking for a dick to suc-”

Pamela roughly shoved her inside the stall. The captain fell on the toilet seat.

“Ow! You’re crazy?!”

Pamela closed the door of the stall.

She relished the fear she saw dawn upon the captain’s face.

“No! Wait! Please!”

Punches and groans were briefly heard.

Then there was the rummage and rustle of a uniform being stripped off.

**************

Once in the corridors, Cassandra wordlessly turned her cloaking device on again. She then began to walk in one direction.

Apparently, Barbara knew what the younger woman wanted, because she followed the sound of her footsteps without any question.

Selina jogged after them. “Where are we going now? The bombs are all defused, right?”

“The boiler room.”

“Why are we heading there?”

“These clowns seemed to know about us. They were looking for ‘party poopers’. It means somebody told them about us. They maybe found their friends you left in the boiler room. We better check if they’re still in the closet.”

“Didn’t we just agree Harley and her buffoons are a big diversion?” Selina objected. “Perhaps we should focus on Ivy’s part of the plan.”

“I’m sending all the info we have right now to Batman. If Ivy wants a diversion tonight specifically, he can try and find for what with his computer. In the meantime, we make sure Harley’s gang doesn’t cause any collateral.”

Catwoman nodded. “Sounds good. But keep your eyes open. If they’re free, they’re not going to prance around in garish outfits.”

They turned around an empty corridor, and came across two women dressed as performers for the party – one Supergirl and one Wonder Woman.

The Supergirl performer didn’t have a wig. Half of her hair was dyed pink.

The two pairs briefly froze and glared at each others.

“Wipe that smile off your face.” Selina warned Barbara.

The young redhead immediately jumped Erica.

Hannah’s eyes widened. “How did you-”

“The hair was a dead giveaway.” Catwoman intervened.

“Knew it!” the crook disguised as Wonder Woman exclaimed.

Catwoman noticed the glasses. They were familiar. She smirked mockingly.

“Got out of your closet? Did you have fun?”

Hannah snarled. “You! It’s payback time! Bitch!”

“Such language. Do you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth?”

Hannah lunged forward.

Selina side-stepped the woman’s attack, and in the same motion hit her neck with the edge of the hand. The Harley fangirl was knocked out by the neck-chop. She landed onto the floor with a ‘thud’, and went still.

“Pathetic.”

At the same time, she heard the sound of a punch to the temple, and a grunt. She turned just in time to see Erica go still, and Barbara get up with a smile.

Cassandra was standing next to her, with her cloak device deactivated. She hadn’t needed to intervene.

“Good job. Their boss should be next.” Selina said.

Suddenly, they heard a shrill sound.

The Museum’s alarm.

“Looks like somebody discovered one of the mugged girls.” Barbara mused.

“About damn time!” Catwoman complained. “I hate these amateurs’ beginner’s luck!”

“It’ll also make things harder for you.” Batgirl remarked.

Selina shrugged. “The day they catch me is the day I deserve to be caught.”

“The bombs?” Cassandra intervened with her raspy voice.

“They’re all defused. Shouldn’t be a problem.” Barbara answered. “You think Quinn will escape?”

Selina shook her head. “She’s way too crazy for that.”

“Then we’re not done yet.”

“Let’s do it from the shadows, please. GCPD and I aren’t exactly best buddies.” Catwoman said.

Barbara smiled thinly. “Don’t worry. Shadows are our thing.”

**************

Harley discovered Shona, Antonia, and Carlita in the storage room in which her gang had planted the biggest gas bomb.

They were bat-cuffed and deeply unconscious. The bomb was sabotaged.

Then the alarm began to blare.

“Oh. Poopie.”

Harley pondered the situation.

Things were bad. The whole plan was going south. And the bat-handcuffs were a telltale proof of who the culprits were.

Three of her Harleys were out cold. She didn’t know how to unlock ‘Bat-Made’ handcuffs. Erica and Hannah weren’t answering her texts, which didn’t bode well either, and she suspected all the bombs were already defused as well.

However, Harley wasn’t scared – nor even angry. She firmly believed that in every crisis, there was an opportunity.

Sure, her Harleys were going to be arrested, and she couldn’t exactly carry several unconscious women all by herself.

However, so couldn’t the Bats. Police was bound to come. Lots of police officers. They’d load her girls in one of their vans.

A very convenient van which she could hijack...

In the confusion of the search, with dozens of half-naked women being found left and right, who would notice if one officer was swiftly whisked away and replaced by an impostor?

Harley grinned to herself, and slipped out of the building through a window.

**************

“Thanks for the uniform, captain. Oh! And, word of advice. Before you slut-shame someone, look at yourself in a mirror.” Pamela said to her victim.

The captain was indeed wearing a white balcony bra that was partly see-through, and a black g-string.

The unconscious woman was on the toilet seat, restrained by tape and cables stolen from the restrooms’ supply closet. She was tightly wrap-gagged. Her wrists and hands were both cable-tied and taped behind the toilet pipe. Her legs and thighs were frog-tied with cables and tape wrapped around them. The position was designed to be uncomfortable.

Ivy lightly kicked the door of the stall close. “Have a good night.” she quipped.

Pamela moved the locker to ‘Occupied’, then checked her new appearance in the mirror of the restrooms.

The captain uniform was a decent fit. She chose against dyeing her hair – her time was short, and somebody could enter the restrooms any moment. She nodded to herself. She’d have to make do with what she had. The uniform alone should be enough to allow her to enter the control room.

Then, once she released her pheromones, having a good disguise would be a moot point. The operators would all be under her control.

Pamela exited the restrooms. The transfer of her girls was bound to take place any minute now.

**************

The police sirens were blaring in the distance. How much time had passed already?

Harley didn’t know.

But she knew to be patient when the need arose.

Harley was a psychologist by training, but in an other world she could’ve made a successful career as a professional gymnast or acrobat. Though in a way, her criminal endeavors allowed her to still make use of her natural agility and the gymnastic lessons of her younger years.

Quinn was lying in ambush on top of some emergency stairs, in an alleyway near the Museum of Natural History. By now, the police had probably combed the museum, and found nothing but girls trussed up in their skivvies. Thus, they had deduced she had run away. They were most likely expecting she had left the area, but they’d search the district anyway – if only to find all the girls who may have been mugged and stashed out of sight. They weren’t expecting her to stay in the lion’s den. After all, who would be crazy enough to face a literal squadron of cops all by herself?

Luckily for Harley, even though people knew she was crazy, a lot didn’t realize she was THAT crazy.

The blonde smiled when, from her vantage point, she finally saw a police officer arrive nearby.

The cop was a familiar face. She was a Latina with brown eyes, an angular-looking face, and black hair tied up into a ponytail. She was wearing black shoes, blue trousers, a grey police uniform jacket over a white uniform shirt, and a blue police cap. A black belt was wrapped around her waist. On it were strapped her gun, badge, and handcuffs.

Renee Montoya.

… Works for me.

The policewoman walked right under Quinn’s spot.

“Negative. The alleyway is empty. Montoya, out.” she said in her radio.

With the agility and grace of a champion gymnast, Harley jumped from the emergency stairs and pounced on her prey.

The policewoman barely had the time to let out a “Oooofff!”

Harley landed on top of Montoya’s shoulders, and used her body mass to make the cop fall onto her back and to pin her on the ground. She wrapped her legs around the police officer’s throat and neck, and squeezed. The Latina gurgled, flailed, and grabbed Harley’s thighs to try and loosen the unconventional sleeper-hold, but to no avail. Her heels were frantically, but uselessly, kicking the ground.

“Three… Two… One… Aaaaand you’re down!” Harley chanted to herself.

Right on cue, Montoya’s body squirmed one last time, then her eyes rolled back, she let out a faint muffled moan, and went limp.

Harley unwrapped her legs after the woman passed out unconscious.

She dragged her burden behind a nearby dumpster, and divested her of her outfit. It wasn’t her first time mugging a cop for her uniform, so removing the equipment belt and clothes was easy.

Montoya was left clad in dark blue boxer undershorts, and a black tank top.

“No bra?” Harley said to the unconscious cop. “I get the feeling. Gotta leave the twins free, right?”

Harley cut her cocktail dress into strips, and used them to bind Montoya’s limbs, wrists, and ankles, and to cleave-gag her. She lifted and dropped the unconscious policewoman inside the dumpster to conceal her. She also threw inside the remains of her party dress, her jewels, and her high-heels. Then she closed the lid shut.

Finally, she slipped into the police uniform. She adjusted the cap to obscure her face, then left her hiding spot behind the dumpster.

**************

Pamela reached her destination.

The moment of truth.

The captain’s badge opened the door of the control room without any resistance.

Pamela was greeted by the sound of an argument.

“General! Your orders don’t make any sense! Why are you delaying the transfer? These are dangerous criminals. Any minute we waste give them more chance to escape...”

“Looks like I’m just in time.” Ivy said to herself.

The operators and soldiers noticed her.

“Who-?”

She immediately released her mind-control pheromones into the room.

“Greetings, gentlemen.”

Ah, I love it when things go just as planned...

**************

Finding the police van in which the Harleys were going to be transported was easy. Harley simply needed to follow the noise.

On her way, she came across an other officer. The woman was busy checking the dumpsters of the alleyway.

Oh, oh. Quinn thought to herself. Give her enough time, and she’ll find Montoya eventually.

Sonia Alcana was a detective of the Gotham City Police Department. She was a slim curvy woman with medium brown eyes, short neck-long light brown hair, and a beauty spot under the left eye.

Being a detective, she wasn’t dressed as a rank-and-file cop. She was clad in a black long-sleeved top, light grey trousers, and black shoes. Her pistol was stored in a holster under her left shoulder.

No other cops around. They’re all busy around the vans. Should I lock her in a dumpster? Do I have the time?

Sonia finally noticed Harley.

“Status report, officer.”

“Nothing here. I guess Quinn ran away. That devilish rogue… I’m going to check on the other prisoners’ transfer. Oh, and the dumpsters that way were all empty. No mugged women there. So no need to keep on checking.”

Sonia glared at her, and frowned.

Harley tilted her head. “Is there something on my face?”

“You’re wearing Montoya’s uniform.”

“You memorized her outfit?” Harley grimaced. “That’s creepy. You sound like a stalker right now.”

Sonia pulled out her walkie talkie to call for backup.

Harley kicked the device out of her hand before she could.

The detective moved out of reach, and drew her gun before Harley could close in.

“Freeze!”

“Okay, okay!”

“On your knees. Hands behind the head.”

“That’s not gonna help the creep factor…”

“On your knees!”

“Fine, jeez!”

Sonia took her handcuffs, and grabbed Harley’s left wrist.

Quinn suddenly grabbed the detective’s forearm. In the middle of her palm, a little hand buzzer was concealed. Except it was no mere toy. It was actually as powerful as a military-grade tazer.

“Gah!” Sonia squeaked.

She collapsed onto Harley, out cold. The latter caught the limp body, and laid her onto the ground.

Harley tapped her lower lip. “If Montoya’s clothes are so recognizable, maybe I should get a change of outfit…”

She grabbed the detective by the armpits, and dragged her behind the dumpster she had been checking two minutes ago.

**************

Clad in orange prisoner uniforms, Violet, Lily, Poppy, and Sakura were escorted through the corridors of the base. Each henchwoman was thoroughly shackled, and watched by a soldier.

Their guards were four women wearing camouflage grey army uniforms – jackets and trousers, with matching military caps, grey shirts, and black combat shoes.

One was a blue-eyed blonde, one was a green-eyed redhead, and two were brunettes – one with a dark skin and brown eyes, one with a light skin and blue eyes. The blonde and the redhead had their hair tied up into a doughnut-like military bun, the light-skinned brunette had short neck-long hair and a square cut, and the dark-skinned brunette’s haircut was a small ponytail.

“Why did it take them so much time to get one van ready?” Violet complained. “I thought the US Army was a bit more efficient.”

“Talk about wasting the taxpayers’ money.” Lily added.

The two shared a mocking chuckle.

“You better behave, or you’ll get the hoods.” one soldier barked, referring to the black hoods they sometimes used on prisoners to restrain their senses.

Violet and Lily kept quiet.

The four criminals were led to a secured parking lot, in which their transfer van was waiting for them.

One woman dressed as a captain was standing next to the armored vehicle.

“Captain. Is something wrong?” the leading soldier asked. “We’re off-schedule.”

“Schedule’s changed. General Vreeland’s orders.”

“What kind of change?”

The officer smirked. “The kind that’ll make you switch places with your charges.”

**************

Pamela threw a small gas bomb right in the middle of the group. The glass container broke on impact, and released a powerful sleep gas which engulfed everyone in the room.

Pamela didn’t care – she had built an immunity to it. And so had her henchwomen.

The soldiers of course weren’t so lucky. One by one, they fell onto the floor, and went still.

Violet, Lily, Poppy, and Sakura shared one quick glance – the time to overcome their surprise. Then they smiled.

“Boss! We knew you’d come!” Violet exclaimed.

“Never doubted you one second!” Lily added.

Pamela answered with a thin, but genuine, smile. “And that’s the reason why I came.”

“So what’s the plan now?” Sakura intervened.

“You’ll take these four’s uniforms. Then we’ll dress them up in your prisoner clothes. And we’ll pretend to do the ‘prisoner transfer’…”

“… with them in our stead.” Poppy finished her sentence.

“That’s genius!” Sakura added.

“Time is of the essence, girls.” Pamela warned. “Less gawking, more stripping.”

Lily took a knee next to the blond-haired soldier. “You used sleep gas. Why?” she inquired.

“I used my last mind-control pheromones in the control room. Had to make do with what I had left.”

“Okay, but why sleep gas?”

“Harley.” Pamela answered.

Her henchgirls and she shared a brief glance. They didn’t need more explanation.

Thus, they didn’t waste time, and stripped the four sleeping soldiers of their uniforms.

The blonde and the dark-skinned brunette were wearing plain grey bra and knickers. Probably some sort of army dress code. The skivvies of the light-skinned brunette were more kiddie-looking: candy pink briefs with a white waistband strap, and a matching t-shirt bra.

The red-haired soldier, however, was wearing a lacy black thong with a scarlet rose pattern, and a matching lace-adorned demi-bra.

Lily snorted when she saw the woman’s raunchy undergarments. “She’s lucky we need her dressed as a prisoner…”

“How do we make sure they’re not recognized as soldiers?” Poppy asked, as she was beginning to dress up the blonde guard in a prisoner uniform.

Pamela grinned. “They talked about prisoner hoods, didn’t they?”

**************

Ten minutes of playing dress up later, Harley exited her hiding spot now dressed in Alcana’s clothes.

She left behind the dumpster the real Sonia, whose wrists were cuffed with Montoya’s handcuffs. Her legs were bound and her mouth was cleave-gagged with strips of Montoya’s uniforms. She was clad in purple bikini panties and a blue exercise bra.

The blonde dusted her hands, satisfied with herself.

A commotion suddenly caught her attention. She discreetly took a peak from her corner. A group of women were being escorted by police officers.

Her girls.

Harley adjusted her stolen outfit. It was time to put the detective clothes to good use. Those dumb cops were going to be completely flummoxed!

Before she could exit the alleyway proper, a voice called her from behind:

“Hello, Harley.”

“Ark! Careful, creep! You almost gave me a heart attack! Who are you anyway?”

The woman was dressed as a caterer, but her face was familiar.

“Catwoman?!”

“The one and only.”

“How did you catch up with me?”

“You wasted, like, ten minutes to steal Alcana’s clothes.”

“Oooooh... right. In hindsight, maybe the change of outfit was superfluous.”

Harley heard a faint noise.

Black Bat had turned off her cloaking device.

“Oh, poopie.”

**************

Pamela was satisfied. In spite of Harley’s hiccups, everything was going according to her plan.

The four unconscious soldiers, now dressed in prisoner uniforms, were tightly restrained to the back seats of the armored van with chains and shackles. Each soldier’s head was fully covered by a black hood designed to blindfold her. The hoods also conveniently concealed the fact that the four women were tightly gagged to prevent them from exposing the charade after they woke up: Their own socks had been shoved into their mouths, and thick strips of cloth were tied around their lower faces and in-between their lips to prevent them from spitting their gag.

Ivy closed the back door of the vehicle.

Outside, Violet, Lily, Poppy, and Sakura were adjusting their soldier uniforms and gear. The military caps would be enough to obscure their facial features.

Ivy nodded at them.

“Good. Let’s drive, girls-”

Pamela was abruptly interrupted by a high-pitched cry.

Sakura had been hit by a projectile – a night blue batarang which had released a powerful jolt of electricity upon contact. Knocked out instantly, the Asian henchwoman fell onto the ground.

“We’re under attack!” Poppy screamed.

She frantically attempted to take cover, but was hit by an other electric batarang. The red-haired henchwoman groaned, fell on her side, curled up, and went still – unconscious as well.

“Violet, Lily, regroup with me!” Pamela instructed.

The blonde and the brunette managed to dodge a third projectile, and reached her.

Ivy’s eyes quickly scanned the corner under the roof from where the attacks were coming.

The broad-shouldered figure in a bat-suit was unmistakable.

“Batman. Of course. Should’ve known you had a gadget to see through the clothes.”

“I don’t need one.”

“How can you be here so fast? Did you guess my plan just by hearing of Harley’s heist? Or was it one of your brats?”

Batman didn’t deign answering her questions. “Are you going to come quietly?” he asked instead.

Ivy shared a glance with Violet and Lily. Her two henchwomen readied their stolen machine guns.

Pamela snarled, and took a battle stance. “Not a chance.”

Once again, Batman didn’t answer. He got ready for the fight, silently acknowledging them.

“Let’s dance.” Ivy spat with a harsh grin.

**************

The Harleys were being loaded into a police van. Shona, Carlita, and Antonia were still unconscious and bat-cuffed. Erica and Hannah were plain-handcuffed. They were the only ones still conscious.

An officer led Harley into the back of the vehicle. The blonde was bat-cuffed, and a bit roughed up. Cassandra Cain didn’t play nice, and Catwoman had had some pent-up anger to vent.

“Room for one more?” the cop said to his colleagues with a laugh.

“Leave the jokes to us, honey.” Quinn retorted.

The officer huffed, and shoved Harley inside. She was seated next to Erica.

The cop slammed the door shut.

“Guess you don’t take constructive criticism.” Harley shouted at the door.

“Looks like the whole gang is here (minus Harvey).” Hannah commented

Harley frowned. “Funny. I think we’re forgetting something…”

“If you forgot, then it means it’s not important.” Erica objected.

“Yeah, you’re right.”

**************

The chauffeur uniform was currently helping her blend in, but she was aware it’d soon paint a target on her back.

The Harleys had been caught. It wouldn’t take police long to find out about the missing party girls – and their missing minibus with chauffeur. Then, they’d hear the Gang of Harleys actually had one more girl than usual.

She needed a change of scenery, plus a quick change of clothes.

Loyal criminals fought to the bitter end, but smart criminals knew when to leave the sinking ship. Then again, if the Harleys had treated her like she was their equal, maybe she’d have felt compelled to give them a hand. Impersonate a policewoman, and attempt to rescue them.

But they had made their stance on her clear now, hadn’t they?

They didn’t take her seriously. They didn’t consider her part of their gang. They mocked her, called her their ‘Temp’.

When she had asked to infiltrate the party with them, they had said she was barely qualified to be their driver. They had laughed, and laughed.

Well, who’s laughing now?

Jenna Duffy was used to being laughed at. Her supercriminal beginnings in the Mad Hatter’s gang had left her stuck with the alias of ‘Carpenter’. Nobody took her seriously, they all saw her as the girl to hire when they need to build a new lair. Her short bushy twin-tails, plain brown hair, green eyes, and the freckles on her cheeks didn’t exactly help her looking intimidating. And yes, even she admitted, her very first confrontation with Batman had been an utter humiliation – she had been so intimidated that she had let him cuff her without resistance.

Yes, Jenna was used to being laughed at. But each instance still bruised her ego.

I may not be worthy of the fancy hair dye or the nickname, but in the end I’m the last woman standing. she thought bitterly.

Jenna was lingering in the district. She could have used the minibus to escape, but she feared someone could find out about her cover before she was out of reach – whether the police or the Bat-family. She needed a change of identity, or at least a change of vehicle.

Thankfully, the commotion at the museum was attracting onlookers and bystanders. She just needed to grab the first opportunity that arose.

An argument soon caught her attention.

At a police blockade, she saw a woman getting angry at the officers guarding the street.

“What do you mean, I can’t access the gala? Do you know how long it took me to put on this costume?!”

The woman was indeed dressed in a way that would only make sense in a costume party. She was wearing a black three-cornered hat adorned with a white feather, a black eye-mask, black leather boots, striped red-and-white trousers, a white cloth sash tied around the waist, a blue shirt with white American stars, a white jabot, red long gloves, and a red cape. There was black lipstick on her lips. She was holding a prop cavalry saber.

Jenna frowned. The outfit looked familiar. It brought to her mind faded memories of her school years.

She suddenly remembered a history lesson.

Ah yes! “Miss Liberty”! The superheroine who had operated during the American Revolutionary War.

Historians were calling her the first 'modern masked heroine'. Her true name was Bess Lynn. She was a frontier nurse and a staunch American patriot that was vehemently opposed to British tyranny. However, she couldn't openly oppose the British in fear they would retaliate by hurting her brother, who was being held captive in England. Disguising herself with a black mask and wig, she assumed a costumed identity in order to secretly fight the British and organize a "women's underground" movement that helped the American forces in the war against them.

Jenna was however hoping the real Miss Liberty's costume hadn’t been as 'theme park-y'...

“I’m supposed to be the surprise of the party!” the performer was still complaining.

“Ma’am. I think they won’t want any more surprise tonight. It's best you wait in your car. Or, even better, that you return home. You’ll be safer there.” the policeman retorted.

The Miss Liberty performer huffed, but then walked away.

Jenna noticed she and the woman were roughly of the same height, and that her neck-long black hair (fashioned into women’s 18th style) was a wig.

She came up with a plan.

**************

Carol wasn’t in a good mood. She hated having to put on one of those ridiculous outfits for nothing. She was a trained actress, she had studied to perform in theater, and she was reduced to party entertainment to pay her bills. The Miss Liberty gig was far from the most degrading – she’d already worn much worst outfits during these fancy parties. But it was so garishly patriotic that Carol couldn’t help but feel ridiculous – in a way, more than when she was a bunny girl.

She hoped and prayed the real Miss Liberty didn’t wear a costume so… ‘theme park-y’.

Carol reached her car, which she had left in a secluded parking. (She didn’t want onlookers to see her dressed in this costume.)

The one silver lining was that, thanks to her insurance policy, she would get paid even though she hadn’t attended the party.

The performer’s thoughts were however interrupted by a: “Oh please, I need help!”

Carol turned. The newcomer was a young woman – a chauffeur judging by her outfit. With her bushy twin-tails and the freckles on her cheeks, she looked pretty harmless.

She was also quite naive, if she took the Miss Liberty costume at face value. Did she think she lived in a comicbook? Real heroines didn’t dress like the American flag in Gotham City. (She’d have to go to Metropolis for them.)

“Uh… Miss… I’m not a real-”

“I was supposed to do my morning shift, but my cat fled my apartment… It’s on the emergency stairs… and I’m afraid of heights… I can’t climb the stairs to reach him...”

“Ah. Then I guess I can help.”

Carol wasn’t a real heroine. But being treated as one, even because of a misunderstanding, felt nice.

“Oh, thank you so much!” the brunette exclaimed, taking her hand in relief.

Carol followed the chauffeur in an alleyway nearby.

“Okay. Where is it- Wait! What are you doing?!”

The sounds of a brief scuffle followed suit.

WHACK!! THUNK!!

Then, the silence.

**************

Jenna dragged the unconscious Miss Liberty performer in a blind spot of the alleyway.

“Would you look at that… I’m just as good as anyone else at mugging people and stealing their outfits…”

She was muttering to herself, but she wished the Gang of Harleys were there to hear it – and see her in action.

“I can improvise a lie… I can drag them without getting tired...”

Jenna laid her burden onto the ground once they were concealed by a wall, then worked on taking off the woman’s costume.

“I’m just as fast at stripping them...”

Contrary to what the Miss Liberty performer had claimed, the outfit was actually quite easy to remove and put on. The boots weren’t tight-fitting, and the gloves were easy to pull off. She unwrapped the waist sash, loosened the trousers, then shimmied them down the legs – revealing light pink cotton panties with a floral pattern. Then, she grabbed the three-cornered hat, eye mask, black wig, and the wig cap underneath. The Miss Liberty performer’s real hair was strawberry blonde and neck-long. Finally, Jenna pulled off the woman’s jabot and tunic, leaving her in her light blue t-shirt bra.

“I know bondage well-enough...”

Jenna was always carrying a roll of duct tape on her. She encased the strawberry-blond-haired woman’s hands and wrists with tape, then wrapped several layers around the calves. She wrapped the last remaining tape around the woman’s mouth and lower face to silence her.

Finally, she left the performer’s unconscious body in the blind spot behind the wall to conceal her. She also threw the chauffeur uniform there.

Jenna untied her bushy twin-tails, and used the wig cap to compress her hair. She put on the wig. Next, she slipped into the costume – trousers and tunic first, then the cloth sash, the boots, the jabot, and the eye mask. She finished with the hat and the gloves.

The result was stunning. Save for the freckles on Jenna’s cheeks and her lack of black lipstick, it was impossible to tell her apart from the woman she had just mugged.

“I’m as much part of the team as anyone else.”

Jenna picked up the discarded prop saber, and confidently walked away from the alleyway. She playfully jiggled the keys and hummed to herself, acting the part of the innocent bystander.

On her phone, she saw the news that Harley’s gang was being arrested. Some big clash was also taking place between Batman and Ivy – or had ended with the Black Knight’s victory, depending on the source.

Would you look at that. Carpenter is coming out on top tonight.

Jenna reached the performer’s car.

From afar, she heard a faint noise – like some muffled detonations.

One second later, a bolas-like device pinned her arms against her torso. At the same time, a second bolas wrapped itself around her legs.

Jenna shrieked, fell on her butt, and squirmed on the ground.

Two figures landed in front of her. One was a young man dressed in black and blue, the other was a teenager dressed in red and green.

“You’ve missed the party, Duffy.” Nightwing joked.

“If you wear the costume, you might as well join the fun.” Robin added.

Shit!

She had forgotten about the boy wonders!

“I didn’t do anything! I just drove the minibus!” Jenna blurted.

“Aaaaaand you just confessed.”

“What?! No! I didn’t! Not fair! NOT FAIR!”

**************

For obvious reasons, and even though she had helped save the day, Catwoman hadn’t wanted to stay anywhere nearby cops – Barbara had been the one delivering Harley to them.

Currently, Selina was waiting hidden in an alleyway for the officers to vacate the premises. Barbara and Cassandra were with her.

“The last girl of Harley’s gang has been caught. And Batman stopped Poison Ivy. She’ll be joining her henchwomen in their new high-security jail.” Batgirl said after receiving a message on her phone.

Next to her, Black Bat allowed herself a thin smile.

Selina too was feeling very satisfied. The kind of satisfaction one felt when they had gotten rid of a rival who always rained down on their parade.

Unless Harley or Ivy broke out, of course. But hopefully she’d have at least a few months of reprieve.

“And another victory for Team Bat and Cat.” she said to Barbara.

“Bat Family.” the redhead corrected her.

“It’ll be a cold day in hell when you call me Batwoman. I’m no girl scout.”

Barbara pocketed her cellphone. “Speaking of which. Now that Harley and Ivy have been dealt with, there’s still the business of your mugging of Vicki Vale.”

“Didn’t we agree I’d be left off the hook?”

Barbara’s retort didn’t miss a beat. “We agreed on a head start.”

Selina answered with the famous ‘Oh Crap! Smile’: “Right. I forgot.”

“That’s a lie, and you know it.”

“You spent too much time with me…” Catwoman mused. “So… How about… 24 hours?”

She heard Cassandra’s raspy voice behind her.

“24 seconds.”

Selina stared at the young woman. “Is this payback for all the times I teased you? You shouldn’t hold grudges, Mini-Batman. It’ll give you wrinkles.”

Black Bat turned her cloaking device on. “23.” she began counting.

Catwoman didn’t waste any more second with sarcasm, and high-tailed as fast as she could.

Oh, how she TRULY wished she lived in the universe where the cat-themed thief had the upper-hand on the goody-two-shoes...

Post by **rufusluciusivan** » Sun Aug 23, 2026 1:17 pm

Post by **tirepanted3** » Mon Aug 24, 2026 11:27 am

I guess I'll start by bringing up the one line of dialogue that seems really out-of-character:

“Oooooh... right. In hindsight, maybe the change of outfit was superfluous.”

Harley Quinn, calling a uniform steal unnecessary? That doesn't sound like her at all!

But I digress. This was a fun and chaotic climax, with a lot going on and a lot of fun character interactions. Perhaps a few too many characters for a single chapter (by the time Poison Ivy's henchgirls showed up, things started to feel a bit crowded, and that's before we get to Batman's cameo), but at the same time, it does feel cool to have a chapter bringing together all the different characters from chapters past.

(Well, except Huntress, who was sadly absent. Sorry, Helena, better luck next time...)

Quite a funny opening scene - I love Erica and Hannah's interactions and arguments over stealing disaguises. The choice to include "Supergirl" and "Wonder Woman" as uniform stealing targets was an interesting one, although sadly the real ones could not appear, what with them being too powerful to be overwhelmed by the Gang of Harleys. (Although Harley herself did once canonically mug WW for her costume - in a storyline that was amusingly referenced here - so who knows.)

I'm not sure I'd ever heard of Miss Liberty before. Or if I have, I'm confusing her with some of the other Golden Age "patriotic" heroines like Miss America or Liberty Belle:

https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Joan_Dale_(New_Earth)
https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Elizabeth_La ... New_Earth)

In any event, it's nice to see Jenna in her "official" universe. Perhaps there's a Jenna Duffy in every USB universe, each one as unlucky as the last.

Don't give up, Jenna, one of you will eventually get things right.

Lots of offscreen muggings in this chapter, which adds to the comedy. The Jenna/Carol scene springe to mind, as does Pamela's mugging of the crass captain. (I assume this captain character is not based on any canon DC character - perhaps for the best, as she seems quite rude.

)

I noticed a lot of animated influence on the choice of victims here - Renee Montoya, Sonia Alcana (presumably not a superhero in this version), and the version of Supergirl from My Adventures with Superman. (I don't really care for that show but their Supergirl's design is cute.) DC's animated shows really are an influential bunch, arguably more so than a lot of their recent movies. (The cartoons are where Harley originated as well, after all.) So that was cool to see.

Erica and Hannah's relationship reminds me a bit of Claire and Elaine. Seems like every universe has multiple "canon events" including a romance between two women who can't help getting on each other's nerves.

“Got out of your closet? Did you have fun?”

Oh Selina, that was mean...

“...Oh, and the dumpsters that way were all empty. No mugged women there. So no need to keep on checking.”

Some great Harley lines. She definitely joins the action on this one, although it ends just as poorly for her as the others.

A fun little double-decker of a story overall. I do wish there was the use of some more canon superheroines from the comics, but I do understand that the DC universe doesn't present quite as easy a crop of characters for a USB story as the Marvel universe (ironic, considering how prolific Harley and Catwoman are at USB scenes). Even Batman's continuity, while more "down to earth" than Superman or several others, features plenty of larger-than-life characters who wouldn't really work for street-level disguise purposes. But it's still fun to see how things work on the Earth-USB-DC universe (still workshopping that name...).

meditions142 · Post by **meditions142** » Mon Aug 24, 2026 11:49 am

Another fun chapter!

Loved Pamela using the gas bomb and the imagine of the four soldier guards falling to the floor knocked out.

And it is also cool they used the unconscious women as basically props to make it look like prisoners were being transported. Like the idea of not only stealing the women's uniforms but then using the women themselves basically as part of the disguise.

Also loved the wonderful off screen take out of Carol. So well described: "'Okay. Where is it- Wait! What are you doing?!' The sounds of a brief scuffle followed suit. WHACK!! THUNK!! Then, the silence." Think it was a good old fashion punch out.

Then I love Jenna's comments:

“Would you look at that… I’m just as good as anyone else at mugging people and stealing their outfits…”

“I can improvise a lie… I can drag them without getting tired...”

“I’m just as fast at stripping them...”

“I know bondage well-enough...”

Fun dialogue!

Post by **rufusluciusivan** » Mon Aug 24, 2026 1:12 pm

tirepanted3 wrote: Mon Aug 24, 2026 11:27 am I guess I'll start by bringing up the one line of dialogue that seems really out-of-character:

“Oooooh... right. In hindsight, maybe the change of outfit was superfluous.”
Harley Quinn, calling a uniform steal unnecessary? That doesn't sound like her at all!

May I hit this statement with a: "CONTEXT!"

She just got caught because of said uniform stealing. Ironically, Earth-USB Harley Quinn doesn't define herself as a uniform stealer first and foremost. That'd be more Catwoman's thing.

But I digress. This was a fun and chaotic climax, with a lot going on and a lot of fun character interactions. Perhaps a few too many characters for a single chapter (by the time Poison Ivy's henchgirls showed up, things started to feel a bit crowded, and that's before we get to Batman's cameo), but at the same time, it does feel cool to have a chapter bringing together all the different characters from chapters past.

(Well, except Huntress, who was sadly absent. Sorry, Helena, better luck next time...)

This two-parter had the potential to be a small saga, but I purposefully tried to make it as short as I could. Hence why there is the feeling the story is overcrowded. Ivy's and her henchwomen's breakout alone could've planted the seeds (pun intended) for a third chapter (or even a couple of chapters). Hitting them with Batman at the end was the equivalent of a GM's "Rock Falls, Everyone Dies". I didn't want to leave any loose end - so they end up interrupted and captured by the one person who wouldn't give them any chance to escape.

(I don't think there'll be a next time however.)

Quite a funny opening scene - I love Erica and Hannah's interactions and arguments over stealing disaguises. The choice to include "Supergirl" and "Wonder Woman" as uniform stealing targets was an interesting one, although sadly the real ones could not appear, what with them being too powerful to be overwhelmed by the Gang of Harleys. (Although Harley herself did once canonically mug WW for her costume - in a storyline that was amusingly referenced here - so who knows.)

I chose Supergirl because I adore her design in My Adventures with Superman, and Wonder Woman because I had no better idea. (And because the reference to the canon scene in which Harley mugs her was basically gift-wrapped to me.) Plus indeed, since these two are way above the paygrade of Gotham's villains, since was the closest thing to a USB scene featuring them we could get.

I'm not sure I'd ever heard of Miss Liberty before. Or if I have, I'm confusing her with some of the other Golden Age "patriotic" heroines like Miss America or Liberty Belle:

I didn't know Miss Liberty existed before I began writing this saga, and to be honest I don't even recall how I came across her while doing research...

I chose her because her costume felt delightfully "theme park-y".

In any event, it's nice to see Jenna in her "official" universe. Perhaps there's a Jenna Duffy in every USB universe, each one as unlucky as the last. Don't give up, Jenna, one of you will eventually get things right.

Given all the limelight Jenna's "lawyer-friendly" counterpart receives in the Marvel saga, I figured out the proper DC version deserved an appearance as well. Since she works with Quinn at times, it felt logical for her to be the "Temp" of the Gang. The jokes of her being put upon will never get old, hence why she doesn't even get to escape at the end.

Lots of offscreen muggings in this chapter, which adds to the comedy. The Jenna/Carol scene springe to mind, as does Pamela's mugging of the crass captain. (I assume this captain character is not based on any canon DC character - perhaps for the best, as she seems quite rude. )

Offscreen muggings are tons of fun, a favorite trope of mine.

I noticed a lot of animated influence on the choice of victims here - Renee Montoya, Sonia Alcana (presumably not a superhero in this version), and the version of Supergirl from My Adventures with Superman. (I don't really care for that show but their Supergirl's design is cute.) DC's animated shows really are an influential bunch, arguably more so than a lot of their recent movies. (The cartoons are where Harley originated as well, after all.) So that was cool to see.

Can I make a confession? All my knowledge comes from the animated shows. I think the number of comicbook issues I have ever read in my life barely reaches the double-digit. Like, I recall the one in which Tweedle-Dee and Dum try to usurp the Mad Hatter (because it's Jenna Duffy's debut

), the two-parter starring Jenna Duffy when she works for a villain who's clearly "Evil Steven Spielberg", the Annual #1 of The Batman Adventures, and the Court of Owls. So yeah, there's not even a thematic consistency...

Sonia is indeed not a superheroine in this version, but I already used the Batwoman joke with Selina

, and I couldn't find a way to properly feature a mythology gag about that aspect of the canon version.

My Adventures with Superman is too focused on humour at times (I have traumatic flashbacks of Jimmy's cringe-y romantic subplot in season 3), but when they hit the mark, they really hit the mark. The final fight with Brainiac at the end of season 2 is still ingrained in my brain. And the show has my favorite versions of Lois Lane and Supergirl.

Erica and Hannah's relationship reminds me a bit of Claire and Elaine. Seems like every universe has multiple "canon events" including a romance between two women who can't help getting on each other's nerves.

The resemblance is 100% coincidental though.

And to be honest, they are a lot less "bicker-y" than Claire and Elaine. They're just having a rough night, what with being mugged like common bystanders...

“Got out of your closet? Did you have fun?”

Selina: And you get that "closet" both refers to the piece of furniture and your homosexual relationship, right?

Hannah: Yes, we get the word play...

(Note: I shamelessly stole a joke from The Baloo Identity sketch by Robot Chicken here.)

Some great Harley lines. She definitely joins the action on this one, although it ends just as poorly for her as the others.

Hannah's and Harley's "nope there's nothing suspicious" dialogues were the funniest ones of this part in my opinion. Well, them and Hannah's "Gosh, this is so awkward. I sound like a total weirdo. I can’t wait to knock her out, and end this conversation." Speaks volumes on what levels of reality they're operating.

A fun little double-decker of a story overall. I do wish there was the use of some more canon superheroines from the comics, but I do understand that the DC universe doesn't present quite as easy a crop of characters for a USB story as the Marvel universe (ironic, considering how prolific Harley and Catwoman are at USB scenes). Even Batman's continuity, while more "down to earth" than Superman or several others, features plenty of larger-than-life characters who wouldn't really work for street-level disguise purposes. But it's still fun to see how things work on the Earth-USB-DC universe (still workshopping that name...).

I'm glad you enjoyed this two-parter. I regret not featuring more canon characters, but I didn't want to make this story into an other saga, so I willingly restrained the scope.

Post by **rufusluciusivan** » Mon Aug 24, 2026 1:13 pm

meditions142 wrote: Mon Aug 24, 2026 11:49 am Another fun chapter!

Loved Pamela using the gas bomb and the imagine of the four soldier guards falling to the floor knocked out.

And it is also cool they used the unconscious women as basically props to make it look like prisoners were being transported. Like the idea of not only stealing the women's uniforms but then using the women themselves basically as part of the disguise.

Also loved the wonderful off screen take out of Carol. So well described: "'Okay. Where is it- Wait! What are you doing?!' The sounds of a brief scuffle followed suit. WHACK!! THUNK!! Then, the silence." Think it was a good old fashion punch out.

Then I love Jenna's comments:

“Would you look at that… I’m just as good as anyone else at mugging people and stealing their outfits…”

“I can improvise a lie… I can drag them without getting tired...”

“I’m just as fast at stripping them...”

“I know bondage well-enough...”

Fun dialogue!

Thanks. I'm happy you enjoyed this two-parter.

The gas bomb is a useful writing tool to shorten descriptions and maintain the pacing. No need to write a long fight scene - just throw the gas bomb for a quick win.

Of course, I try to not use it too much...

I liked a lot the idea of the prisoners switching places with the guards who escort them, indeed using the women themselves as part of the disguise. I also loved the imagery of these four guards chained to their seats, gagged and with their identities concealed under hoods. Had this story been a longer saga, there definitely would've been a moment of them whining in their gags trying to get someone's attention, only to be mistakent for prisoners, with Ivy and her henchwomen playing the parts of the escort. Unfortunately, I don't have the time nor the will for a long saga anymore, so I willingly kept that storyline short. To think of it, in spite of the Board's fondness for breakout, this kind of scenario hasn't shown up much. Also, I find it interesting in that it's maybe the only instance for which it'd be justified to re-dress the victims. I usually hate it when it happens in mainstream scenes because it's almost always due to censorship, and it has no in-story reason to happen. This is one of the few scenarios in which there'd be a logical reason to waste time redressing an unconscious person.

Offscreen take outs will always be a loved trope of mine. Didn't have a clear-cut description in mind for that specific one, so I'll leave it to your imagination.

The canon version of Jenna Duffy doesn't get any respect, and the joke works all too well in a USB story. She needed to vent her pent-up frustration.

Post by **tirepanted3** » Mon Aug 24, 2026 1:25 pm

rufusluciusivan wrote: Mon Aug 24, 2026 1:12 pmI didn't know Miss Liberty existed before I began writing this saga, and to be honest I don't even recall how I came across her while doing research... I chose her because her costume felt delightfully "theme park-y".

Ironically, I think most of the DC superheroines best suited to USB muggings are from the Golden/Silver Age comics, and you've mentioned in the past you prefer the modern designs (although a few of them have carried through to the modern day).

Can I make a confession? All my knowledge comes from the animated shows. I think the number of comicbook issues I have ever read in my life barely reaches the double-digit. Like, I recall the one in which Tweedle-Dee and Dum try to usurp the Mad Hatter (because it's Jenna Duffy's debut ), the two-parter starring Jenna Duffy when she works for a villain who's clearly "Evil Steven Spielberg", the Annual #1 of The Batman Adventures, and the Court of Owls. So yeah, there's not even a thematic consistency...

This doesn't surprise me. You've mentioned in the past that you're a big fan of DC's animated shows (and so am I), and the Bruce Timm series have some terrific character designs - some of which are more iconic than their comic counterpart. And their influence is still being felt decades later, especially with female characters (Harley, Roxy Rocket, Renee Montoya, Livewire) who were created for the cartoons and then later integrated into the comics. No shame in using them for inspiration!

My Adventures with Superman is too focused on humour at times (I have traumatic flashbacks of Jimmy's cringe-y romantic subplot in season 3), but when they hit the mark, they really hit the mark. The final fight with Brainiac at the end of season 2 is still ingrained in my brain. And the show has my favorite versions of Lois Lane and Supergirl.

It's okay, but I think I always see it as a lesser cousin to Superman: The Animated Series from the 90s. Always loved that show's version of Lois Lane.

Hannah's and Harley's "nope there's nothing suspicious" dialogues were the funniest ones of this part in my opinion. Well, them and Hannah's "Gosh, this is so awkward. I sound like a total weirdo. I can’t wait to knock her out, and end this conversation." Speaks volumes on what levels of reality they're operating.

Yes, Hannah's inner monologue was quite funny as well. Love the dialogue that plays up the mugging/uniform stealing tropes like that.

Post by **rufusluciusivan** » Mon Aug 24, 2026 6:39 pm

tirepanted3 wrote: Mon Aug 24, 2026 1:25 pm It's okay, but I think I always see it as a lesser cousin to Superman: The Animated Series from the 90s. Always loved that show's version of Lois Lane.

I didn't watch a lot Superman TAS, ironically. Guess I was never in front of TV when they were airing it. It was always Batman TAS and the Justice League. (And X-Men Evolution and Spiderman TAS for Marvel.)

90s animated Lois Lane is a classic, but I love the tomboyish hyperactive (and also insecure) version of MAWS. MAWS-Lois Lane was one of the sources of inspiration for Earth-USB Mary-Jane.

Yes, Hannah's inner monologue was quite funny as well. Love the dialogue that plays up the mugging/uniform stealing tropes like that.

I mean, mugging a woman for her costume is fine, but an awkward conversation?! That's just too much!

Ironically, I think most of the DC superheroines best suited to USB muggings are from the Golden/Silver Age comics, and you've mentioned in the past you prefer the modern designs (although a few of them have carried through to the modern day).

It's more the artstyle I have a hard time clicking with, to be honest, not necessarily the designs.

meditions142 · Post by **meditions142** » Mon Aug 24, 2026 9:02 pm

rufusluciusivan wrote: Mon Aug 24, 2026 1:13 pm
The gas bomb is a useful writing tool to shorten descriptions and maintain the pacing. No need to write a long fight scene - just throw the gas bomb for a quick win.

It is a perfect tool when you need to take out a group of women fast. I like to imagine scenes such as a group of guards monitoring the CCTV/control room. One gas bomb dropped into the room and all the women are out. Trackman actually did the exact scene in one of his stories a few years back that I loved.

The idea of the gas causing multiple women to all slump unconscious is really awesome!

Post by **rufusluciusivan** » Thu Aug 27, 2026 6:43 am

meditions142 wrote: Mon Aug 24, 2026 9:02 pm
rufusluciusivan wrote: Mon Aug 24, 2026 1:13 pm
The gas bomb is a useful writing tool to shorten descriptions and maintain the pacing. No need to write a long fight scene - just throw the gas bomb for a quick win.

It is a perfect tool when you need to take out a group of women fast. I like to imagine scenes such as a group of guards monitoring the CCTV/control room. One gas bomb dropped into the room and all the women are out. Trackman actually did the exact scene in one of his stories a few years back that I loved.

The idea of the gas causing multiple women to all slump unconscious is really awesome!

I knew you had a lot of love for the sleep dart and nerve pinch tropes, but it seems the gas bomb is a personal top favorite of yours as well? I'm taking notes.

Not my favorite as a reader personally, but as a writer it is indeed a good way to speed up the pacing of the story. Group scenes are always tricky to write - they can become so long. So it's good to have tricks to shorten some of them.

Uniform Stealing Board

Stop Clowning Around!

Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!

Re: Stop Clowning Around!