Glimpse of the Future

[meditions142]

Great story! Love the idea of Carrie and Ethel complaining about Jessie while not knowing Jessie was tied up and unconscious under her desk in her bra and panties. We know that they sedated Jessie. Would love to know exactly how they did it.

Then I thought it was great with Carrie and Ethel being knocked out we don’t see it but instead get the great description of the sounds.

I liked Maribel getting a little excited about seeing Carrie and Ethel stripping include her “So sexy . . . and so cute . . . a perfect combo” comment and her little pinch of Carrie’s waist.

The take out of Constance was awesome. Love the trick the guard into coming over to help and then knock her out. The extended description of Constance’s struggles was fantastic.

Great image of Constance being unconscious in the crate with Carrie and Ethel’s heads resting on her shoulders.

The lifeguard take out was great. Millie gets a face full of knockout gas just goes out. However, Flavie puts up a pretty good fight. But she is no match for Talia. She surrenders and lets herself get sprayed with the knockout gas.

And the story just goes on with such great detail. Just fantastic.

[Torreken]

Great story in two very unconventional settings.
Love the attention to detail when describing the women, their undergarments and the way they were bound and gagged.
I specially liked the scenes with the zoo employee who ended up tied up in the restroom.

[rufusluciusivan]

simon4242: Thanks.

meditions142:

We know that they sedated Jessie. Would love to know exactly how they did it.

Talia simply used a good old-fashioned injection. Later in the story, Maribel will pester Talia so that she buys her a brand new dart gun. But for now, they have to do things the old-fashioned way.

Details are what makes a story worth reading, so I'm happy to hear you appreciated them.

I think Maribel's bubbly personality makes her a very entertaining character to follow - and she is a great source of comedy since she's partnered with the dour Talia. But I also like how it highlights how very grey her morality is, because she's having her fun at the expense of women she mugs. Plus, she's also a peeping Tom. In a way, she's just as morally grey as Talia - if not more.

Constance apparently made quite the impression, for the only woman in this USB story chapter who got mugged WITHOUT having her clothes stolen. Quite the accomplishment. Give her a medal.

torreken: During the writing process, while I was aware that a zoo was an unconventional setting - even unheard of to my knowledge at the time -, I didn't think a swimming pool was a rarely seen setting on this board. It was probably because I could think of plenty of scenes featuring women wearing swimsuits. However, now that you mention it, I can't remember a story taking place in a pool... There are probably some, but I can't remember any.

Trying to have a good rhythm with the descriptions is one of my obsessions - as well as balancing out fun details, description, and plot.

The victim left in the restroom on the toilet seat is a trope I'm very fond of. It was fun finding excuses to have Talia (aka the plot) keep annoying Anna.

[meditions142]

We know that they sedated Jessie. Would love to know exactly how they did it.

Talia simply used a good old-fashioned injection.

[/quote]

Ah, thanks. Can picture the scene. The pretty young secretary is returning to her desk when Talia appears from behind her, grabs her over the mouth to keep her quiet and hold her still, and then injects her in the neck. In no time at all Jessie is off to a deep, long lasting sleep.

[Torreken]

simon4242: Thanks.

meditions142:

We know that they sedated Jessie. Would love to know exactly how they did it.

Talia simply used a good old-fashioned injection. Later in the story, Maribel will pester Talia so that she buys her a brand new dart gun. But for now, they have to do things the old-fashioned way.

Details are what makes a story worth reading, so I'm happy to hear you appreciated them.

I think Maribel's bubbly personality makes her a very entertaining character to follow - and she is a great source of comedy since she's partnered with the dour Talia. But I also like how it highlights how very grey her morality is, because she's having her fun at the expense of women she mugs. Plus, she's also a peeping Tom. In a way, she's just as morally grey as Talia - if not more.

Constance apparently made quite the impression, for the only woman in this USB story chapter who got mugged WITHOUT having her clothes stolen. Quite the accomplishment. Give her a medal.

torreken: During the writing process, while I was aware that a zoo was an unconventional setting - even unheard of to my knowledge at the time -, I didn't think a swimming pool was a rarely seen setting on this board. It was probably because I could think of plenty of scenes featuring women wearing swimsuits. However, now that you mention it, I can't remember a story taking place in a pool... There are probably some, but I can't remember any.

Trying to have a good rhythm with the descriptions is one of my obsessions - as well as balancing out fun details, description, and plot.

The victim left in the restroom on the toilet seat is a trope I'm very fond of. It was fun finding excuses to have Talia (aka the plot) keep annoying Anna.

Tropes well executed are the essence of this genre, plus the 'subversion' of it with the second visit. An A+ scene.
I never thought a pool could be a setting for a USB scenario because everyone can get a swimsuit without stealing it from someone, but the way it is integrated in the story it can of makes sense. Anyway, jumping the shark in terms of plausibility is not a problem

[tirepanted3]

Well, I certainly wasn't expecting the next part so soon! This is a welcome surprise. I certainly wish I could post chapters this quickly. (I was hoping to have the next chapter of my saga posted this week, but it's not completed yet - I want to embellish some scenes before posting.)

I'm really enjoying the dynamic between Talia and Maribel, and the rapport of theirs that drives the story. On the surface, their dynamic is familiar - Talia is the more serious of the duo, Maribel is more fun-loving. But their relationship is improved by the level of detail in their characters, whether it's Talia's jealousy over Maribel's popularity at the pool, or Maribel's fixation with fun hats ("Killjoy"). They play off each other quite well, both as friends and fellow infiltrators, and I'm interested to see how the story develops them further.

The public swimming pool was another unconventional setting, and while the types of uniforms specific to the setting are limited (swimsuits, mainly), the story made good use of a variety of disguises, starting with the deliverywomen and the poor secretary. (I love the detail of Talia completing the secretary's work for the day while impersonating her, so that no one would come in to check on the real secretary for the rest of the day. Shows that she's both resourceful and multi-talented.) The scene with Lynn the sports enthusiast was also fun, recalling the Blue Jays/Cardinals rivalry from "Win the Big Game." (Speaking of which, I wonder whatever happened to Selena and Lucina? Knowing them, they're probably still pulling off infiltrations and heists, with hilarious consequences, some fifteen years later. )

One understated aspect of this chapter is the way the characters bend the USB rules - not every uniform or outfit ends up stolen. And that turns out to be fine. Constance had the most memorable mugging of the chapter - but it was particularly interesting that Talia and Maribel (justifiably) did not strip her, having no need for her uniform. And the lucky mother from later in the chapter, who gets to keep her clothes and consciousness simply because she has kids with her, was a nice detail as well. It adds to the suspense and realism when not every potential USB victim winds up getting tied up in her underwear.

And of course, it's great to see the original cast return, if a bit older and greyer than before. Glad to see that Klenia hasn't lost her spark, and that she and Shayna are still a loving couple. Looking forward to seeing them return to their infiltrative ways. (They certainly have the motivation. Poor Zoé...)

[rufusluciusivan]

meditions142:

Ah, thanks. Can picture the scene. The pretty young secretary is returning to her desk when Talia appears from behind her, grabs her over the mouth to keep her quiet and hold her still, and then injects her in the neck. In no time at all Jessie is off to a deep, long lasting sleep.

More or less.

torreken:

Tropes well executed are the essence of this genre.

Indeed. Tropes are tools after all.

tirepanted: The secret is that I waited six months until all the story was (almost completely) written before I posted the first part. If I had the time to commit all my day to writing (like I used to have a few years ago), I may post one chapter per day...

Though I won't keep in step forever either. This story has five parts.

I'm really enjoying the dynamic between Talia and Maribel, and the rapport of theirs that drives the story. On the surface, their dynamic is familiar - Talia is the more serious of the duo, Maribel is more fun-loving. But their relationship is improved by the level of detail in their characters, whether it's Talia's jealousy over Maribel's popularity at the pool, or Maribel's fixation with fun hats ("Killjoy"). They play off each other quite well, both as friends and fellow infiltrators, and I'm interested to see how the story develops them further.

I'll leave it ambiguous whether Talia truly was jealous, or simply annoyed that it attracted unwanted attention which could jeopardize the mission. To me, the second option is way more hilarious.

These two are indeed a ton of fun to write. I wasn't expecting to like writing them so much - given how dark grey they are morality-wise. During the early drafts, they were basically a living plot device to get the story started with Zoé's kidnapping. Then I started to add details to flesh them out, and the rest is history.

One understated aspect of this chapter is the way the characters bend the USB rules - not every uniform or outfit ends up stolen. And that turns out to be fine. Constance had the most memorable mugging of the chapter - but it was particularly interesting that Talia and Maribel (justifiably) did not strip her, having no need for her uniform. And the lucky mother from later in the chapter, who gets to keep her clothes and consciousness simply because she has kids with her, was a nice detail as well. It adds to the suspense and realism when not every potential USB victim winds up getting tied up in her underwear.

And of course, it's great to see the original cast return, if a bit older and greyer than before. Glad to see that Klenia hasn't lost her spark, and that she and Shayna are still a loving couple. Looking forward to seeing them return to their infiltrative ways. (They certainly have the motivation. Poor Zoé...)

One of the funniest and most interesting parts when writing this chapter was to add a few doses of realism. The most obvious ones are indeed the instances in which Talia and Maribel can't steal an outfit even though they're infiltrators in a USB story.

Though there was also one centered around Klenia. The story addresses that her hijinks over the years actually got her into trouble, and explains she managed to get away with them mostly because she had "a friend high up" - so to speak.

I'm delighted to be able to have the "main cast" back in action.

The scene with Lynn the sports enthusiast was also fun, recalling the Blue Jays/Cardinals rivalry from "Win the Big Game." (Speaking of which, I wonder whatever happened to Selena and Lucina? Knowing them, they're probably still pulling off infiltrations and heists, with hilarious consequences, some fifteen years later. )

Win the Big Game was indeed a reference I had in mind when writing this scene.

Or maybe Selena and Lucina retired on an island that they own...

... tanned and rested and alone...

... surrounded by enormous piles of moneeeeeyyyyy!



Sorry. I've been in a musical mood lately...

[tirepanted3]

I'll leave it ambiguous whether Talia truly was jealous, or simply annoyed that it attracted unwanted attention which could jeopardize the mission. To me, the second option is way more hilarious.

Ah I hadn't considered it that way. It is certainly funnier in that sense.

These two are indeed a ton of fun to write. I wasn't expecting to like writing them so much - given how dark grey they are morality-wise. During the early drafts, they were basically a living plot device to get the story started with Zoé's kidnapping. Then I started to add details to flesh them out, and the rest is history.

As I've said before, I love morally grey characters, so Talia and Maribel are right in my wheelhouse. Their motivation (money) may not be the most original, but it's cool to watch them turn on their employers when they learn they were ripped off. Makes them interesting "wild cards" in the story. And of course, it appears they are now on a collision course with Aster and her team - I'm intrigued to see how that plays out.

I love it when characters who start out as plot devices take on their own lives when details and layers are added to their characters. I've had that happen a few times in my stories - Ashley most famously, but also with more recent examples like Evelyn, Harper, and Jenna. It's fun to explore new characters as they are added to ongoing sagas.

Sorry. I've been in a musical mood lately...

So I've noticed. No need to apologize, who doesn't love a good musical.

[esercito sconfitto]

...I am so glad they are back, and another time here we are, we all, the USB's crowding in the back of the so familiar Aster's flower shop

and yes even the uniform stealing broads get old... and they become silver foxes

and now we have a nest of silver foxes... the prelude of the story is promising....especially considering that now they are around my age

and here there is Klenia, now 48 years old, with so many trophies from sportwomen, collected during so many years...( please add a list! I want a list! I am serious, I want to be allowed to enter her trophy room )

and I knew it was all about Zoé ... even as a kid she was one of the most unforgettable characters in the saga

( by the way, I suggest you to post a link to the story about the FIRST time Zoé was kidnapped... so many fictional years ago )

wait a moment... why does my mind keep reminding " Vingt Ans après" by Alexandre Dumas?

[rufusluciusivan]

I find it funny that one of the main headquarters for uniform stealers in the USB universe is a flower shop...

Yep. One of the main appeals of the story was to feature older versions of the characters. And featuring Zoé finally of age to take part in USB hijinks was an other one.

Silver foxes. My thoughts exactly!

especially considering that now they are around my age

Ouch! This doesn't get us any younger, doesn't it?

( please add a list! I want a list! I am serious, I want to be allowed to enter her trophy room )

I suppose every sport known to Man. Including billiard, darts and petanque.

( by the way, I suggest you to post a link to the story about the FIRST time Zoé was kidnapped... so many fictional years ago )

I take it you mean by Jewel when she was a child? For now, I admit that in my headcanon, it didn't involve infiltration or uniform stealing. Jewel simply sent hitmen to wipe out Zoe's family, then pretended to "rescue" her. It would be a very dark story anyway, since it would take place during the last days of the civil war - when the capital city descended into mass hysteria because they were losing the war. Most people in charge of the old government either killed themselves or fled to avoid being put on trial. It left their political allies by themselves, and they started to turn on each other. Characters mention the events several. I found it was satisfyingly ironic that, ultimately, the totalitarian government ultimately destroyed itself before the rebellion could (poetic justice much?). By the time the rebels actually took control of the capital city, they were bummed out because almost all the people they WANTED to put on trial were already dead...

Maybe I'll someday have the inspiration... Though probably not for now. My state of grace (and of intense activity) is about to end (just the time to finish posting this story), and soon I'll become dormant again.